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<blockquote data-quote="Calamity Jane" data-source="post: 582719" data-attributes="member: 13882"><p>Oh, I'm so sorry. Right now, he is saying the <strong>exact same things</strong> my difficult child said when getting caught. This was during outpatient treatment as well. I felt such a fool, like husband and I were going through the treatment, but the person who <u>really </u>needed it was thumbing his nose at it all.</p><p>I think some of your difficult child's attitude is denial, some is bravado. Underneath, he is scared and ashamed, although I'm sure he won't show it outright. The whole, "get out of my business" changes once tough consequences are imposed, and those consequences are more meaningful to some kids initially, and not to others. Your consequences may not have meant much to difficult child, but once the law is involved and parents are in the background, sometimes the difficult child's reevaluate their situations. Our difficult child "broke" pretty soon, and seems to have turned around once he went in front of the judge; to some kids, that is not the case. You will have to take a step back and let him absorb this himself. He's going to be processed through the law and hopefully, he will see how leveling it is. </p><p>Of course it always seems to be tougher on the parents. I'm so sorry, and I truly hope this is a serious wake up call for him. It is definitely not too late, I hope he fully accepts rehab and changes his course. Take care of yourself, you've done so much to help.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Calamity Jane, post: 582719, member: 13882"] Oh, I'm so sorry. Right now, he is saying the [B]exact same things[/B] my difficult child said when getting caught. This was during outpatient treatment as well. I felt such a fool, like husband and I were going through the treatment, but the person who [U]really [/U]needed it was thumbing his nose at it all. I think some of your difficult child's attitude is denial, some is bravado. Underneath, he is scared and ashamed, although I'm sure he won't show it outright. The whole, "get out of my business" changes once tough consequences are imposed, and those consequences are more meaningful to some kids initially, and not to others. Your consequences may not have meant much to difficult child, but once the law is involved and parents are in the background, sometimes the difficult child's reevaluate their situations. Our difficult child "broke" pretty soon, and seems to have turned around once he went in front of the judge; to some kids, that is not the case. You will have to take a step back and let him absorb this himself. He's going to be processed through the law and hopefully, he will see how leveling it is. Of course it always seems to be tougher on the parents. I'm so sorry, and I truly hope this is a serious wake up call for him. It is definitely not too late, I hope he fully accepts rehab and changes his course. Take care of yourself, you've done so much to help. [/QUOTE]
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