Busy and Jaypee thanks so much for the support. Busy, I can't imagine the grief that comes from losing a child. I guess part of the reason I didn't mention about my husband's drinking, is that I have seen this as a place to talk about our children not so much our spouses. Of course when I am also dealing with my husband it makes handling all that is going on with my son a lot harder. My husband has never been violent or mean when he is drinking, in fact everything is always "great" and I shouldn't worry about anything. He gets drunk maybe 3-4 nights a week and doesn't drink during the day. On the nights he is under the influence it ranges from a little buzzed to staggering drunk. Because of his behavior dealing with my son's behavior, be it reporting him as a run away ,picking him up from the police stations, finding mental health treatment facilities, counseling, etc.is always up to me. He says I do all this because if he handles it he will not be handling it right. The fact of the matter is he just doesn't deal with it the majority of the time. He is a great guy when he is not under the influence. I have tried like anyone would to talk to him about his behavior and as we all know it is up to him to do something about it. In the past he would get himself together and would keep it under control, this has not been the case for the last couple of years. As I see it now my choices are either live with it or get out. At this point I am not ready to leave . I have seen a few different therapist over the years (he refuses to see anyone).
I have really tried to think of myself. I try not to cover for him and let him feel the consequences of his actions. Don't know what else I can do at this point. Thanks again for your support. I too want it to be Jan. 2nd.
