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Parent Emeritus
Now that I kicked my 18 year old daughter out, where do I go from here?
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 709011" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>You are dealing with domestic violence here. NOT that I am saying that YOU abused your daughter, but she is in an abusive and controlling relationship with this man and she has NO idea how to get out of it. By tossing her out, she is now completely without resources to get away from him. She is in the middle of his family and surrounded by his horrible messages of how it is all her fault and she is worthless. </p><p></p><p>You NEED to contact the domestic violence agency in your area and get some intensive help. You are going to need them to help break his hold on your daughter. It would have been better if she was still in your home and you had more contact with her and influence over her. Now, you have to figure out how to even contact her safely because he is going to ramp up his control and possibly start to harm her. Even without the physical abuse, this is an unsafe relationship and if she gets out of this, she still is going to need a LOT of therapy to be able to choose a healthy relationship in the future. She is dealing with low self esteem and has already been bullied and made to feel worthless. Men like this know how to find girls with these issues and they just won't let go of them easily. It takes professional help and a lot of hard work to break their psychological hold.</p><p></p><p>I know that he got her to do things that were against your house rules, and that was probably because he knew you would kick her out and then he could have total control over her. Where else could she go but to him if you threw her out of the house? Your instincts are afraid for her life for a very good reason. But now you have a MUCH harder road and you may not be able to break his hold on her for a very long time, if ever.</p><p></p><p>PLEASE, I am absolutely BEGGING you, seek out the domestic violence agency in your area and work closely with them. Learn what you can do. Go through counseling with them to learn how to act and react to your daughter. Learn how to do what you can to help your daughter break this evil man's hold on your daughter. Pray that it is possible to break his hold before he destroys her. </p><p></p><p>I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 709011, member: 1233"] You are dealing with domestic violence here. NOT that I am saying that YOU abused your daughter, but she is in an abusive and controlling relationship with this man and she has NO idea how to get out of it. By tossing her out, she is now completely without resources to get away from him. She is in the middle of his family and surrounded by his horrible messages of how it is all her fault and she is worthless. You NEED to contact the domestic violence agency in your area and get some intensive help. You are going to need them to help break his hold on your daughter. It would have been better if she was still in your home and you had more contact with her and influence over her. Now, you have to figure out how to even contact her safely because he is going to ramp up his control and possibly start to harm her. Even without the physical abuse, this is an unsafe relationship and if she gets out of this, she still is going to need a LOT of therapy to be able to choose a healthy relationship in the future. She is dealing with low self esteem and has already been bullied and made to feel worthless. Men like this know how to find girls with these issues and they just won't let go of them easily. It takes professional help and a lot of hard work to break their psychological hold. I know that he got her to do things that were against your house rules, and that was probably because he knew you would kick her out and then he could have total control over her. Where else could she go but to him if you threw her out of the house? Your instincts are afraid for her life for a very good reason. But now you have a MUCH harder road and you may not be able to break his hold on her for a very long time, if ever. PLEASE, I am absolutely BEGGING you, seek out the domestic violence agency in your area and work closely with them. Learn what you can do. Go through counseling with them to learn how to act and react to your daughter. Learn how to do what you can to help your daughter break this evil man's hold on your daughter. Pray that it is possible to break his hold before he destroys her. I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. [/QUOTE]
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Now that I kicked my 18 year old daughter out, where do I go from here?
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