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Out of control Asperger Bipolar 17 year old...
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<blockquote data-quote="Winnielg" data-source="post: 584339" data-attributes="member: 16059"><p>I just responded to the post about one parent's child always reverting to physical threats. That is our life all the time now. </p><p></p><p>My son is 17 years old and was diagnosed with asperger's when he was 6. He has received fantastic services thru the school district with his IEP since the 1st grade. I am not even sure where he would be now without that base, in addition to the YEARS of external therapeutic services. In the beginning of middle school he was also diagnosed with ODD and the aggression, menacing behavior and threats began. We begun to deal with the police and a service NYS provides called Mobile Crisis, several times per year in response to scary threats (8th grade) at first and then as each year passed our son has physically assaulted either myself or my husband many times. I am the main target. Last year after yet another assault against me where he threw me up against a wall among other things, we decided to have him committed to a psychiatric facility. It was that or have him arrested. As I am very familiar with the criminal justice system, I knew this is really not the place for a spectrum kid. He spent 15 days in a facility - which I am told is a long time - and was released with an additional diagnosis of bipolar. He is takes quite the assortment of medications at this point - lithium, lamictal, abilify and now wellbutrin. His rage is a bit better but he feels that he does not really have to follow the rules of our home and is mostly oppositional for the sake of being so most times. </p><p></p><p>We have been seeing, in addition to his regular therapist and medication management person, a spectrum disorder specialist, as a family once per week (since the May 2012 assault). Things are always up and down - mostly down. We used to seize upon the up times, but our energy is mostly depleted so it is harder to do so. We have been working for the last few years on executive function and adaptive behavior skills with the goal towards adult independence. He is even in a different HS this year in a special BOCES program for spectrum teens. He had a full psychological last year which included many tests the school did not typically do. The results are disheartening. He falls into a gap. His cognitive behavior is HIGH - more than two standard deviations above the mean, but his executive function and adaptive behavior is alarmingly low - all other tests falling more than two standard deviations below the mean. Adaptive behavior and executive function is living life - hygiene, organization, getting from A to B, etc. These skills are far more important that just have high cognitive ability. And will prevent him from being independent without a lot of work on his part. He fights us and all supports put into place every step of the way, every day. </p><p></p><p>All of this is NOT working. As we approach the potential end of HS - he is a senior - things are getting worse with the threats of violence happening all the time. With a zero tolerance policy for this behavior now, we are hoping we can last until the end of June when school ends. At this point and after another incident last week, my husband wants him out of the house by the end of June. I agree as I am no longer safe in my own house, but obviously feel so conflicted. </p><p></p><p>We have been working for over a year to get services set up for our son in the event that we get hit by a bus, so to speak, when he is an adult - services to help coordinate care. Hopefully these will be able to be put into place soon.</p><p></p><p>I guess I really would like to hear how other parents are dealing with transitioning to adulthood with a child who really cannot safely continue to reside in the home.</p><p></p><p>I tried to keep this short. Thank you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Winnielg, post: 584339, member: 16059"] I just responded to the post about one parent's child always reverting to physical threats. That is our life all the time now. My son is 17 years old and was diagnosed with asperger's when he was 6. He has received fantastic services thru the school district with his IEP since the 1st grade. I am not even sure where he would be now without that base, in addition to the YEARS of external therapeutic services. In the beginning of middle school he was also diagnosed with ODD and the aggression, menacing behavior and threats began. We begun to deal with the police and a service NYS provides called Mobile Crisis, several times per year in response to scary threats (8th grade) at first and then as each year passed our son has physically assaulted either myself or my husband many times. I am the main target. Last year after yet another assault against me where he threw me up against a wall among other things, we decided to have him committed to a psychiatric facility. It was that or have him arrested. As I am very familiar with the criminal justice system, I knew this is really not the place for a spectrum kid. He spent 15 days in a facility - which I am told is a long time - and was released with an additional diagnosis of bipolar. He is takes quite the assortment of medications at this point - lithium, lamictal, abilify and now wellbutrin. His rage is a bit better but he feels that he does not really have to follow the rules of our home and is mostly oppositional for the sake of being so most times. We have been seeing, in addition to his regular therapist and medication management person, a spectrum disorder specialist, as a family once per week (since the May 2012 assault). Things are always up and down - mostly down. We used to seize upon the up times, but our energy is mostly depleted so it is harder to do so. We have been working for the last few years on executive function and adaptive behavior skills with the goal towards adult independence. He is even in a different HS this year in a special BOCES program for spectrum teens. He had a full psychological last year which included many tests the school did not typically do. The results are disheartening. He falls into a gap. His cognitive behavior is HIGH - more than two standard deviations above the mean, but his executive function and adaptive behavior is alarmingly low - all other tests falling more than two standard deviations below the mean. Adaptive behavior and executive function is living life - hygiene, organization, getting from A to B, etc. These skills are far more important that just have high cognitive ability. And will prevent him from being independent without a lot of work on his part. He fights us and all supports put into place every step of the way, every day. All of this is NOT working. As we approach the potential end of HS - he is a senior - things are getting worse with the threats of violence happening all the time. With a zero tolerance policy for this behavior now, we are hoping we can last until the end of June when school ends. At this point and after another incident last week, my husband wants him out of the house by the end of June. I agree as I am no longer safe in my own house, but obviously feel so conflicted. We have been working for over a year to get services set up for our son in the event that we get hit by a bus, so to speak, when he is an adult - services to help coordinate care. Hopefully these will be able to be put into place soon. I guess I really would like to hear how other parents are dealing with transitioning to adulthood with a child who really cannot safely continue to reside in the home. I tried to keep this short. Thank you. [/QUOTE]
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