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The Watercooler
peculiar friend
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 699060" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Nomad. Forgive me. I hope you do not feel I am being hard on you. None of this is your fault. Nor is it your responsibility. But the thing is this: your caring for your friend is palpable, as is your taking responsibility for wanting to responsibly handle problems <em>that are not yours to bear. I see myself in you.</em></p><p><em></em></p><p><em>If somebody who we loves treats us poorly, </em>that is the question.</p><p></p><p><em>If somebody we love suffers, from an affliction, moral or characterological weakness, and we are affected by it, </em>that is the problem with which I have dealt my whole life, the part of it I can remember, and probably all of the rest of it, as well.</p><p></p><p>I have no distance from the quandary in which you find yourself. I lived my whole life struggling (poorly) to deal with it. I regret what I did (and did not) do. Which is really the bottom line. In my responses to your posts, I show just how much I am still haunted by, and feel I bear responsibility for the failures in my relationships with the 3 other people in my nuclear family, my sister, mother and father. My life has been defined by <em>how I believe I have failed each one. </em></p><p><em></em></p><p>So, read my response(s) to you in this light, please.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 699060, member: 18958"] Nomad. Forgive me. I hope you do not feel I am being hard on you. None of this is your fault. Nor is it your responsibility. But the thing is this: your caring for your friend is palpable, as is your taking responsibility for wanting to responsibly handle problems [I]that are not yours to bear. I see myself in you. If somebody who we loves treats us poorly, [/I]that is the question. [I]If somebody we love suffers, from an affliction, moral or characterological weakness, and we are affected by it, [/I]that is the problem with which I have dealt my whole life, the part of it I can remember, and probably all of the rest of it, as well. I have no distance from the quandary in which you find yourself. I lived my whole life struggling (poorly) to deal with it. I regret what I did (and did not) do. Which is really the bottom line. In my responses to your posts, I show just how much I am still haunted by, and feel I bear responsibility for the failures in my relationships with the 3 other people in my nuclear family, my sister, mother and father. My life has been defined by [I]how I believe I have failed each one. [/I] So, read my response(s) to you in this light, please. [/QUOTE]
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