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Planning for mtg with-attny
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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 481452" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>Yep, that's pretty much what I'm doing, except I wasn't actually given a choice, except to refuse to let difficult child come straight home. Well, I was, 2-3 times, but then PO denies that now and says I have no choice. And has his super believing that he'd never given me a choice, that I was trying to dictate the parole plan. I do want that straightened out because due to how bad things got with that probation officer before, I want to nip this in the bud as quickly as possible.</p><p></p><p>The thread has into a lot of details which I am grateful to learn about so I can make sure they get covered. That doesn't mean I plan to go in there with 50 pages of complaints.</p><p></p><p>Now, I have visited difficult child and I might as well not even mention the detention center as a transitional period. difficult child says it is one fight after another there and nothing like the detention center in our old jurisdiction. I believe him because I'm learning quickly that he learns more about what things are really like from staff and other boys in Department of Juvenile Justice and I get the lip service that tries to get a parent to buy into something. Between difficult child preferring to finish his sentencce there than in a detention center and PO already claiming I was trying to write the parole plan, I'll just take this off the table.</p><p></p><p>I told difficult child what had transpired and supposedly this re-entry lady will be coming to interview him again for the group home placement. I told him I did not advocate for this long term placement or anything resembling another sentence. I was shocked that he seemed to believe me so readily, but I was telling the truth. He said well, then, he will make sure he 'doesn't qualify' for it. I asked him how he planned to do that and he said he would refuse to talk to her at all. I warned him about digging himself in deeper but he says that he'll talk to a couple of other boys and see if they have a better idea. Oh, boy....</p><p></p><p>Then he talked a little about where things went wrong last year and these are still concerns we both have. It really is a shame that they don't already have a re-entry program in place that focuses on the issues these boys really have after long term incarceration instead of just focusing on another "earn your way out" program. No program designed to be a diversion or dispositional placement is going to focus on re-integration and re-unification. I guess the people in this state will figure that out in about 2-3 years.</p><p></p><p>difficult child said they have NO program in this state that is fairly short term and focuses on transitioning kids back into home/community. To me, this is a no-brainer that it's needed. These are teens who have been incarcerated for at least a year and thinking they can go back to normal life two days after the door is unlocked is outrageous to me. </p><p></p><p>But since they don't have one- at least according to PO and difficult child and that option has never been presented to me, then it looks like the only chances are difficult child coming straight home or going to a group home. As scared as I am of what will happen if difficult child comes straight home, I'm not liking the visual of difficult child living in that dump until either 1) he's 18 yo with a GED, job, apartment, or 2) he's 18 1/2yo with a high scchool diploma, job, apartment. I really can't see him staying at that place that long. He's very discourage now, especially after his sentence was extended and he misses another set of holidays and another b-day. I honestly think he'd run away from that place and do whatever and get recommitted, or be charged as an adult for whatever. I think there's a slim to none chance he'll be able to suceed coming straight home, too. So I don't know. He asked me what would happen to him if he didn't go to that group home and I told him he'd come straight home. Really, those are the only options. DSS won't allow me to place him because Department of Juvenile Justice owns him, even when he's on parole. DSS won't take him from Department of Juvenile Justice even if Department of Juvenile Justice tried to get them to. DSS says it needs to be coming from Department of Juvenile Justice's funding, it's their problem.</p><p></p><p>I'm going to be concentrating on difficult child's and my relationship because no matter what, I want us to improve our relationship as much as possible and in case he does come home, this can only improve the cahnce that <em>maybe</em> he won't re-offend against me. Yeah...I know....any other suggestions?</p><p></p><p>I apologize for this wording being so bad- I just got home and am trying to re-group!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 481452, member: 3699"] Yep, that's pretty much what I'm doing, except I wasn't actually given a choice, except to refuse to let difficult child come straight home. Well, I was, 2-3 times, but then PO denies that now and says I have no choice. And has his super believing that he'd never given me a choice, that I was trying to dictate the parole plan. I do want that straightened out because due to how bad things got with that probation officer before, I want to nip this in the bud as quickly as possible. The thread has into a lot of details which I am grateful to learn about so I can make sure they get covered. That doesn't mean I plan to go in there with 50 pages of complaints. Now, I have visited difficult child and I might as well not even mention the detention center as a transitional period. difficult child says it is one fight after another there and nothing like the detention center in our old jurisdiction. I believe him because I'm learning quickly that he learns more about what things are really like from staff and other boys in Department of Juvenile Justice and I get the lip service that tries to get a parent to buy into something. Between difficult child preferring to finish his sentencce there than in a detention center and PO already claiming I was trying to write the parole plan, I'll just take this off the table. I told difficult child what had transpired and supposedly this re-entry lady will be coming to interview him again for the group home placement. I told him I did not advocate for this long term placement or anything resembling another sentence. I was shocked that he seemed to believe me so readily, but I was telling the truth. He said well, then, he will make sure he 'doesn't qualify' for it. I asked him how he planned to do that and he said he would refuse to talk to her at all. I warned him about digging himself in deeper but he says that he'll talk to a couple of other boys and see if they have a better idea. Oh, boy.... Then he talked a little about where things went wrong last year and these are still concerns we both have. It really is a shame that they don't already have a re-entry program in place that focuses on the issues these boys really have after long term incarceration instead of just focusing on another "earn your way out" program. No program designed to be a diversion or dispositional placement is going to focus on re-integration and re-unification. I guess the people in this state will figure that out in about 2-3 years. difficult child said they have NO program in this state that is fairly short term and focuses on transitioning kids back into home/community. To me, this is a no-brainer that it's needed. These are teens who have been incarcerated for at least a year and thinking they can go back to normal life two days after the door is unlocked is outrageous to me. But since they don't have one- at least according to PO and difficult child and that option has never been presented to me, then it looks like the only chances are difficult child coming straight home or going to a group home. As scared as I am of what will happen if difficult child comes straight home, I'm not liking the visual of difficult child living in that dump until either 1) he's 18 yo with a GED, job, apartment, or 2) he's 18 1/2yo with a high scchool diploma, job, apartment. I really can't see him staying at that place that long. He's very discourage now, especially after his sentence was extended and he misses another set of holidays and another b-day. I honestly think he'd run away from that place and do whatever and get recommitted, or be charged as an adult for whatever. I think there's a slim to none chance he'll be able to suceed coming straight home, too. So I don't know. He asked me what would happen to him if he didn't go to that group home and I told him he'd come straight home. Really, those are the only options. DSS won't allow me to place him because Department of Juvenile Justice owns him, even when he's on parole. DSS won't take him from Department of Juvenile Justice even if Department of Juvenile Justice tried to get them to. DSS says it needs to be coming from Department of Juvenile Justice's funding, it's their problem. I'm going to be concentrating on difficult child's and my relationship because no matter what, I want us to improve our relationship as much as possible and in case he does come home, this can only improve the cahnce that [I]maybe[/I] he won't re-offend against me. Yeah...I know....any other suggestions? I apologize for this wording being so bad- I just got home and am trying to re-group! [/QUOTE]
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