BBK,
I'm here. I have to preface this with the fact that I am not a big Explosive Child fan. I would have a hard time letting a 6 year old tell me no and rule the roost.
So I would go with more of a John Rosemond approach. I think he would suggest that you lovingly tell your child, "Of course you can come out and have supper. You'll need you're strength since you will be going right back into your room and stay there until you get it cleaned up. Even if it takes the rest of the night."
And mean it. She comes out for dinner and bathroom breaks only. If she falls asleep, she can have breakfast in the morning and then get back to work on her room. She'll put up a fight but she has to see that you mean what you say.
I can't imagine what she will do as a teenager if you don't get things in control now.
I'm sorry that you are having such a hard time. It must be doubly hard to deal with a difficult child when you aren't feeling well.
Hang in there.
~Kathy
