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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 177313" data-attributes="member: 4964">Hi all, &nbsp;I am bringing this to you for voices of sincere reason, and logic.&nbsp; I'm really torn on what to do to help vs. can he help himself vs. he's lazy vs. he's depressed. &nbsp;So here it is in a nutshell - &nbsp;Dude is living with foster family - they are supposed to take him to job interviews and help him with applications.&nbsp; They have not.&nbsp; When we asked WHY - we get the story that Dude doesn't want/need any assistance and insists on doing it himself. &nbsp;When we ask WHY he has no money saved up for probation Dude tells us it's because they won't take him for interviews citing gas is too expensive/have no time etc. &nbsp;When we ask about him around the house? They tell us he's lazy.&nbsp; He tells us THEY want a slave and basically pawn him off on family members and have him over for internet time then make him clean their house while they entertain other people. &nbsp;And today - I get a call from a very depressed Dude.&nbsp; I know depression from lazy - and we talked last weekend about his anger issues/need for medications.&nbsp; He didn't disagree - but today he tells me he's stopped therapy.&nbsp; WHOT????? HOW? You're 17.&nbsp; &nbsp;He tells me - it's not helping.&nbsp; It's a waste of his time - he doesn't have a job - he doesn't get any money - he doesn't care if he goes back to jail - he doesn't care about getting a job, etc....&nbsp;Apparently he also felt the need to call his lazy caseworker and blast him a new one.&nbsp; The man said he was busy - Dude said some very direct things, called him a liar and hung up.&nbsp; (jealous of time with other clients?) Keep in mind - body of a 17 year old emo level of a 12 yo. &nbsp;He was choking up about his puppy - wanted to know how she was.&nbsp; I told him SHE wrote him an email.&nbsp; (daddy I miss you stuff) and he said theyhave NO internet at the foster house - had it turned off.&nbsp; I told him Pootie was out of Puppy chow (we actually feed Nutro) and he got upset saying he had no money etc.....I said it jokingly - he took it to heart.&nbsp; Nice, middle of no where, and no way to look for a job, but then again - would he anyway? &nbsp;So, is this where I call mental health and talk with the doctor because he's 17 /12.....or do I let him fail, because he is depressed beyond helping himself? &nbsp;I'm just really torn.&nbsp; &nbsp;Any ideas.....he supposedly is going to mental health because he QUIT the private psychiatrist. (NICE) and they can give him medications for depression or anxiety.&nbsp; But should I just let him handle it or assume he'll sit there for 15 minutes arms folded, hat pulled over his eyes like a 3 year old and dr. will say &quot;See ya&quot; nothing will get done because he doesnt' want to help himself???? &nbsp;I really want to do this right - but I don't think he's able to discern between depression level he's at vs. he's just being an emo teen.&nbsp; &nbsp;<img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite5" alt=":confused:" title="Confused&nbsp; &nbsp; :confused:" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":confused:" /></blockquote>

[QUOTE="Star*, post: 177313, member: 4964"] Hi all, I am bringing this to you for voices of sincere reason, and logic. I'm really torn on what to do to help vs. can he help himself vs. he's lazy vs. he's depressed. So here it is in a nutshell - Dude is living with foster family - they are supposed to take him to job interviews and help him with applications. They have not. When we asked WHY - we get the story that Dude doesn't want/need any assistance and insists on doing it himself. When we ask WHY he has no money saved up for probation Dude tells us it's because they won't take him for interviews citing gas is too expensive/have no time etc. When we ask about him around the house? They tell us he's lazy. He tells us THEY want a slave and basically pawn him off on family members and have him over for internet time then make him clean their house while they entertain other people. And today - I get a call from a very depressed Dude. I know depression from lazy - and we talked last weekend about his anger issues/need for medications. He didn't disagree - but today he tells me he's stopped therapy. WHOT????? HOW? You're 17. He tells me - it's not helping. It's a waste of his time - he doesn't have a job - he doesn't get any money - he doesn't care if he goes back to jail - he doesn't care about getting a job, etc.... Apparently he also felt the need to call his lazy caseworker and blast him a new one. The man said he was busy - Dude said some very direct things, called him a liar and hung up. (jealous of time with other clients?) Keep in mind - body of a 17 year old emo level of a 12 yo. He was choking up about his puppy - wanted to know how she was. I told him SHE wrote him an email. (daddy I miss you stuff) and he said theyhave NO internet at the foster house - had it turned off. I told him Pootie was out of Puppy chow (we actually feed Nutro) and he got upset saying he had no money etc.....I said it jokingly - he took it to heart. Nice, middle of no where, and no way to look for a job, but then again - would he anyway? So, is this where I call mental health and talk with the doctor because he's 17 /12.....or do I let him fail, because he is depressed beyond helping himself? I'm just really torn. Any ideas.....he supposedly is going to mental health because he QUIT the private psychiatrist. (NICE) and they can give him medications for depression or anxiety. But should I just let him handle it or assume he'll sit there for 15 minutes arms folded, hat pulled over his eyes like a 3 year old and dr. will say "See ya" nothing will get done because he doesnt' want to help himself???? I really want to do this right - but I don't think he's able to discern between depression level he's at vs. he's just being an emo teen. :confused1: [/QUOTE]

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