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Parent Emeritus
Post Rehab, Brother 31, Living at Home Doping, Mom Enabling. Family Split. point of view: Concerned Daughter
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 701226" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>The others have offered most of the advice that I would. I will say that regarding the family money controlled by your mom, notifying the rest of the family who are entitled to part of the money is only fair. They likely have a right to an audit to see if she is handling the money responsibly, and if not then to make another choice for who should have control. For what it is worth, I would not offer to be the one in control of the money, personally, because your mom is going to be very angry over this and you don't need the hassle. Just my thoughts, for whatever they are worth.</p><p></p><p>I am sorry for the situation you are in, and I am glad that you do not have to live with your mother and brother. I hope your father can rescue himself. My brother has wanted to try to get control of my parents' finances a few times, and I found it hysterical as they were supporting him at the time. He was told by a lawyer that without my help AND being totally financially independent of them, he was completely out of luck even if they had severe dementia. They don't, and in fact were working full time when he wanted to do this. He can be a total idiot, in my opinion, but at least he was never in charge of their money - their lives would be awful (He thinks it is wasteful to turn on the heater unless the temperature is below freezing, for example.).</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 701226, member: 1233"] The others have offered most of the advice that I would. I will say that regarding the family money controlled by your mom, notifying the rest of the family who are entitled to part of the money is only fair. They likely have a right to an audit to see if she is handling the money responsibly, and if not then to make another choice for who should have control. For what it is worth, I would not offer to be the one in control of the money, personally, because your mom is going to be very angry over this and you don't need the hassle. Just my thoughts, for whatever they are worth. I am sorry for the situation you are in, and I am glad that you do not have to live with your mother and brother. I hope your father can rescue himself. My brother has wanted to try to get control of my parents' finances a few times, and I found it hysterical as they were supporting him at the time. He was told by a lawyer that without my help AND being totally financially independent of them, he was completely out of luck even if they had severe dementia. They don't, and in fact were working full time when he wanted to do this. He can be a total idiot, in my opinion, but at least he was never in charge of their money - their lives would be awful (He thinks it is wasteful to turn on the heater unless the temperature is below freezing, for example.). [/QUOTE]
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Post Rehab, Brother 31, Living at Home Doping, Mom Enabling. Family Split. point of view: Concerned Daughter
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