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<blockquote data-quote="WiseChoices" data-source="post: 753484" data-attributes="member: 24254"><p>Tonight, I feel absolutely sick about everything. I know I need to set these boundaries, I know I could not have worked with that therapist in terms of billing and getting my daughter a chance to actually get better. And I also understand that she does not understand where I am coming from and is hurting. She feels controlled . Today she said she could drive herself to school . She did fine with it while I was away for a month. She is a good driver. I know she wants to. She wants that independence and I want to give it to her , but am not seeing any cooperation from her of how that could happen. My friend suggested I lert her drive herself to her own appointments. I would love to. My friend said she should pay gas for her own errands. And there is the Crux: she doesn't have an income. And when presented with an opportunity to make a little money by doing my hair , by picking up one of my jobs while I was away, she makes poor choices with that money buying vaping supplies (which are very expensive) and "stuff". I would love to talk to her about these things and right now there is such a communication break down. </p><p></p><p>How can I be told that her mental health is none of my business but she needs a ride there or at least my car, and I have to supply the gas, and buy the medications? By default that is my business. I have never asked what happens in the sessions. I have been respectful .</p><p></p><p>My friend also suggested joint therapy .I would be happy to do that . I don't even know how to ask her . I doubt she would be willing.</p><p></p><p>I feel heart sick. Just broken. I miss my daughter and how we used to be so much. I have told her this and she seems to numb to me. This started when she went off to college and hooked up with a girl and they got very very close very quickly. And daughter told me that she threw me under the bus. I heard about that about narcissists today - how people get discarded. I just don't understand how I got discarded .I was told I was her best friend . She said she did not know how to live without me at school. And now she can't say I love you or hug me? This is before any boundaries I set. I am just crushed and still I must push on.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="WiseChoices, post: 753484, member: 24254"] Tonight, I feel absolutely sick about everything. I know I need to set these boundaries, I know I could not have worked with that therapist in terms of billing and getting my daughter a chance to actually get better. And I also understand that she does not understand where I am coming from and is hurting. She feels controlled . Today she said she could drive herself to school . She did fine with it while I was away for a month. She is a good driver. I know she wants to. She wants that independence and I want to give it to her , but am not seeing any cooperation from her of how that could happen. My friend suggested I lert her drive herself to her own appointments. I would love to. My friend said she should pay gas for her own errands. And there is the Crux: she doesn't have an income. And when presented with an opportunity to make a little money by doing my hair , by picking up one of my jobs while I was away, she makes poor choices with that money buying vaping supplies (which are very expensive) and "stuff". I would love to talk to her about these things and right now there is such a communication break down. How can I be told that her mental health is none of my business but she needs a ride there or at least my car, and I have to supply the gas, and buy the medications? By default that is my business. I have never asked what happens in the sessions. I have been respectful . My friend also suggested joint therapy .I would be happy to do that . I don't even know how to ask her . I doubt she would be willing. I feel heart sick. Just broken. I miss my daughter and how we used to be so much. I have told her this and she seems to numb to me. This started when she went off to college and hooked up with a girl and they got very very close very quickly. And daughter told me that she threw me under the bus. I heard about that about narcissists today - how people get discarded. I just don't understand how I got discarded .I was told I was her best friend . She said she did not know how to live without me at school. And now she can't say I love you or hug me? This is before any boundaries I set. I am just crushed and still I must push on. [/QUOTE]
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