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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 378182" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Katya my heart aches for you. While I personally don't have an issue with cremation.......I know many belief do and they are very hard to let go of especially during such times. (((hugs)))</p><p></p><p>It sounds as if girlfriend is very grief stricken, most likely in emotional shock, and very confused. Her mother unfortunately is making a very bad situation much worse and harder on her daughter than necessary. girlfriend's claim to want to have the baby with her always is a bit worrisome. Makes me wonder if any of this has really sunk in. An understandable desire for a grief stricken mother, but still with all the drama caused by her Mom it makes you wonder about her emotional/mental stability at this time.</p><p></p><p>Nichole and I went through this with her bff a few years back. The girl was an emotional wreck. But at least the grandparents weren't adding in what they felt should be done or not done......or elaborate plans yadda yadda. Nichole's bff and her boyfriend had a small furneral/visitation service. Nichole thought the visitation was a bit over the top. But I explained to her that it was important to her bff that it was important this child, although he didn't live but a few hours, be acknowledge as a member of her family. The whole family is very very poor, but pooled money together to give the girl what she needed to say good-bye. </p><p></p><p>I don't know what has been discussed as far as a service/visitation goes........but I wonder if difficult child's girlfriend is afraid to let go of her baby daughter for fear she'll be forgotten. And via cremation she feels she won't ever have to really let go. Perhaps difficult child or you could encourage some grief counseling for her and him. Losing a child is enormous to deal with, no matter the age of the child. </p><p></p><p>While it was very difficult for Nichole's bff's family to go through the visitation.......it gave the parents what they needed to move on. They were able to acknowledge this child was born, a member of the family, and say their good-byes.</p><p></p><p>I am so very sorry your family has experienced such a loss. Many many heart filled ((((hugs)))) and prayers for all of you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 378182, member: 84"] Katya my heart aches for you. While I personally don't have an issue with cremation.......I know many belief do and they are very hard to let go of especially during such times. (((hugs))) It sounds as if girlfriend is very grief stricken, most likely in emotional shock, and very confused. Her mother unfortunately is making a very bad situation much worse and harder on her daughter than necessary. girlfriend's claim to want to have the baby with her always is a bit worrisome. Makes me wonder if any of this has really sunk in. An understandable desire for a grief stricken mother, but still with all the drama caused by her Mom it makes you wonder about her emotional/mental stability at this time. Nichole and I went through this with her bff a few years back. The girl was an emotional wreck. But at least the grandparents weren't adding in what they felt should be done or not done......or elaborate plans yadda yadda. Nichole's bff and her boyfriend had a small furneral/visitation service. Nichole thought the visitation was a bit over the top. But I explained to her that it was important to her bff that it was important this child, although he didn't live but a few hours, be acknowledge as a member of her family. The whole family is very very poor, but pooled money together to give the girl what she needed to say good-bye. I don't know what has been discussed as far as a service/visitation goes........but I wonder if difficult child's girlfriend is afraid to let go of her baby daughter for fear she'll be forgotten. And via cremation she feels she won't ever have to really let go. Perhaps difficult child or you could encourage some grief counseling for her and him. Losing a child is enormous to deal with, no matter the age of the child. While it was very difficult for Nichole's bff's family to go through the visitation.......it gave the parents what they needed to move on. They were able to acknowledge this child was born, a member of the family, and say their good-byes. I am so very sorry your family has experienced such a loss. Many many heart filled ((((hugs)))) and prayers for all of you. [/QUOTE]
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