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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 682338" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>The illness may not have existed or certainly may not have manifested when he was young.</p><p></p><p>My son was sunny and open and optimistic. Everything changed when he was about 18. There could have been a genetic component. Who knows?</p><p>My son I adopted when he was 22 months. I was aware of his history. He required and benefited from interventions throughout his childhood. But I never thought his adulthood would be like it is.</p><p></p><p>There is a mother here on the board that prepared her child by applying for disability, setting up support systems, etc. She believes these interventions helped her son realize his potential.</p><p></p><p>I believed my son could function fully without these supports. I believed that by assuming he would be limited, would in fact limit him.</p><p></p><p>I believe that both points of view are valid ones, although, if one looked at my son's functioning at a specific point of time, it could be said I was wrong. The thing is, nothing is written yet.</p><p></p><p>I admit, a 30 year sentence grabs one's attention. But the thing is you either believe that people write their own destiny or you do not. Which is not to say that there are not a million different ingredients in a life, that fuel it, and may determine it, and may delimit it. But their is choice too.</p><p></p><p>I believe with all my heart that you and I were good enough mothers who absolutely did the best we knew or could at the time.</p><p>Yes. I worked in prisons many years. I know how easy it is to get there. Having worked there does not mean I understand one thing except that even in prison, probably, especially there, it is possible, even essential to choose the kind of life one has, and people do.</p><p></p><p>COPA</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 682338, member: 18958"] The illness may not have existed or certainly may not have manifested when he was young. My son was sunny and open and optimistic. Everything changed when he was about 18. There could have been a genetic component. Who knows? My son I adopted when he was 22 months. I was aware of his history. He required and benefited from interventions throughout his childhood. But I never thought his adulthood would be like it is. There is a mother here on the board that prepared her child by applying for disability, setting up support systems, etc. She believes these interventions helped her son realize his potential. I believed my son could function fully without these supports. I believed that by assuming he would be limited, would in fact limit him. I believe that both points of view are valid ones, although, if one looked at my son's functioning at a specific point of time, it could be said I was wrong. The thing is, nothing is written yet. I admit, a 30 year sentence grabs one's attention. But the thing is you either believe that people write their own destiny or you do not. Which is not to say that there are not a million different ingredients in a life, that fuel it, and may determine it, and may delimit it. But their is choice too. I believe with all my heart that you and I were good enough mothers who absolutely did the best we knew or could at the time. Yes. I worked in prisons many years. I know how easy it is to get there. Having worked there does not mean I understand one thing except that even in prison, probably, especially there, it is possible, even essential to choose the kind of life one has, and people do. COPA [/QUOTE]
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