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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 622852" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Let me try to answer your questions. Remember, this worked for ME, may not for you <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p><p></p><p>1/Helpful resources: Codependents Anonymous, which was a huge group in a suburb of Chicago when I lived there. I got more out of that group than I ever got out of any professionals. Unfortunately they don't have CODA groups everywhere and not all of them that do exist are equally as wonderful. This group must have had seventy caring members who were so helpful and wise when I was falling on my face. Never could find another group that good once I moved to Wisconsin.</p><p></p><p>My second favorite resource was my psychologist who taught me about taking care of myself, not just everyone else. </p><p></p><p>Although both are in Illinois and I'm not, I still use Al-Anon (which is similar to CODA) and my therapist as my go-to people when I need to stop my stinkin' thinkin.' </p><p></p><p>2/Aside from working out, I love to read and write!!! I have a guilty secret. I fill up my bathtub with bubble bath, light scented candles in the bathroom and bring a book or my Kindle (yes, you saw that right) into the bathtub. I lean back and read, read, read. So far none of my books nor my Kindle have been destroyed by water. I guess if my Kindle fell in the tub, that would put a damper on my relaxing time...lol.</p><p></p><p>3. I like to be near my husband. Sometimes we just are in the same room together and it soothes me. We do talk about almost everything. I make sure he gets a big hug and a kiss before he goes off to work every day. I love him very much and I want him to know it. That is easy for me to do.</p><p></p><p>4. I have taken a spiritual journey that started in my early 30's and I have decided through experiences, some which to me was "proof", that my higher power is always there, always with me, always with all of us and that he or she just wants us to learn how to love one another. I believe in karma, reincarnation, and certainly don't believe we ever cease to exist. This belief in karma, which was quite a long walk, keeps me mindful of doing unto others as I'd want them to do back to me. I did a lot of spiritual reading, tried many churches, explored religious studies, and came to my own conclusions based on experiences. Meditation helps me clear my mind and focus, but I'm only able to do guided meditation or my mind wanders like a two year old kid in a candy store <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p><p>I believe that Buddhism is very wise and while I am not a Buddhist, there is much about Buddhism that I embrace and find comfort in. My spirituality really doesn't have a name <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p><p></p><p>Man, Bits, you ask some hard questions...lolol.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 622852, member: 1550"] Let me try to answer your questions. Remember, this worked for ME, may not for you :) 1/Helpful resources: Codependents Anonymous, which was a huge group in a suburb of Chicago when I lived there. I got more out of that group than I ever got out of any professionals. Unfortunately they don't have CODA groups everywhere and not all of them that do exist are equally as wonderful. This group must have had seventy caring members who were so helpful and wise when I was falling on my face. Never could find another group that good once I moved to Wisconsin. My second favorite resource was my psychologist who taught me about taking care of myself, not just everyone else. Although both are in Illinois and I'm not, I still use Al-Anon (which is similar to CODA) and my therapist as my go-to people when I need to stop my stinkin' thinkin.' 2/Aside from working out, I love to read and write!!! I have a guilty secret. I fill up my bathtub with bubble bath, light scented candles in the bathroom and bring a book or my Kindle (yes, you saw that right) into the bathtub. I lean back and read, read, read. So far none of my books nor my Kindle have been destroyed by water. I guess if my Kindle fell in the tub, that would put a damper on my relaxing time...lol. 3. I like to be near my husband. Sometimes we just are in the same room together and it soothes me. We do talk about almost everything. I make sure he gets a big hug and a kiss before he goes off to work every day. I love him very much and I want him to know it. That is easy for me to do. 4. I have taken a spiritual journey that started in my early 30's and I have decided through experiences, some which to me was "proof", that my higher power is always there, always with me, always with all of us and that he or she just wants us to learn how to love one another. I believe in karma, reincarnation, and certainly don't believe we ever cease to exist. This belief in karma, which was quite a long walk, keeps me mindful of doing unto others as I'd want them to do back to me. I did a lot of spiritual reading, tried many churches, explored religious studies, and came to my own conclusions based on experiences. Meditation helps me clear my mind and focus, but I'm only able to do guided meditation or my mind wanders like a two year old kid in a candy store :) I believe that Buddhism is very wise and while I am not a Buddhist, there is much about Buddhism that I embrace and find comfort in. My spirituality really doesn't have a name :) Man, Bits, you ask some hard questions...lolol. [/QUOTE]
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