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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 710620" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Well. There are a number of parents who post here that do subsidize rent. I have. And I know some other parents do too.</p><p></p><p>And my own son is not showing the good faith as is your son, by working. The balance is in giving a hand up as opposed to carrying him, and removing the incentive for him to do more and try harder.</p><p></p><p>Except as I see it, this way of thinking of mine is both unrealistic and in some ways harsh and judgmental.</p><p></p><p>I have to remind myself that we are different people, my son and I, on different life paths with different values. The incentive for my son will not come from deprivation....</p><p></p><p>I would help my son with the rent if I were you. If it proves to be not helpful you can renegotiate. You can tell him it is a short-term subsidy. Are you talking about an apartment for himself or a room share? With your contribution could you help him get a slightly bigger apartment where he can share with somebody else, and have the control? And the extra rent coming in would cover his additional expense so you would not have to be on the hook?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 710620, member: 18958"] Well. There are a number of parents who post here that do subsidize rent. I have. And I know some other parents do too. And my own son is not showing the good faith as is your son, by working. The balance is in giving a hand up as opposed to carrying him, and removing the incentive for him to do more and try harder. Except as I see it, this way of thinking of mine is both unrealistic and in some ways harsh and judgmental. I have to remind myself that we are different people, my son and I, on different life paths with different values. The incentive for my son will not come from deprivation.... I would help my son with the rent if I were you. If it proves to be not helpful you can renegotiate. You can tell him it is a short-term subsidy. Are you talking about an apartment for himself or a room share? With your contribution could you help him get a slightly bigger apartment where he can share with somebody else, and have the control? And the extra rent coming in would cover his additional expense so you would not have to be on the hook? [/QUOTE]
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