Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Ripped off
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 726106" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>I'm a little conflicted by this. I believe my brother still has his 23 year old college graduate son living at home. (Yeah, I should know this - but last I heard he was.) He's working, saving up I believe. Has a really nice girlfriend and perhaps they are planning the future - I don't really know. But the point is, he's a good kid. No problem at all that I'm aware of. Wasn't in trouble. Had lots of friends. Went to college. Always worked. That kid, I'd let live at home too, especially if I had a house big enough he could kind of take over the basement or something. </p><p></p><p>But, I think it's very, very hard to overcome the parent/child dynamic when an adult kid lives at home. Sure - your house, your rules. Mine were pretty simple; keep the room clean, call if you aren't coming home. But when ours was last at home, at 21 years of age, I was still telling him to brush his teeth and getting mad at him if he called in sick to work! These are not things I should be thinking about with a grown son. NOT MY BUSINESS. But I could not stop "mothering" him. </p><p></p><p>By the same token, depending on where you live, the cost of living is SO high! Here you can get a very decent one bedroom apartment for $450. You can get a decent HOUSE for $600. A room share isn't normal around here because renting a whole apartment is pretty affordable. My son currently lives with his girlfriend in her parent's home. She told me their rent for that house is $1,900/ mo! Colorado isn't the highest cost of living either. I know that he will easily pay $600-$700/mo for an apartment - if he's lucky. With that kind of rental costs, it's not affordable for a minimum wage person. Granted, the minimum wage there is $10.20 per hour, but other states are lower. Federal minimum wage averages currently $1,257/mo GROSS if you work 40 hours. So yes, two people could manage - one not so much. If they don't have reliable friends, what will they do for roommates? They don't want to get deadbeats living with them and be stuck with unpaid bills. </p><p></p><p>IF our son ever came home again, it would have to be like last time. A set period of time, a job, and give us $ (rent) which we will hold until he is ready to move out. </p><p></p><p>But I truly hope that never happens. We're better apart. He's a better person. I'm a better person. I can love him in a whole new way. </p><p></p><p>I agree with RN. Cross that bridge when you come to it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 726106, member: 17309"] I'm a little conflicted by this. I believe my brother still has his 23 year old college graduate son living at home. (Yeah, I should know this - but last I heard he was.) He's working, saving up I believe. Has a really nice girlfriend and perhaps they are planning the future - I don't really know. But the point is, he's a good kid. No problem at all that I'm aware of. Wasn't in trouble. Had lots of friends. Went to college. Always worked. That kid, I'd let live at home too, especially if I had a house big enough he could kind of take over the basement or something. But, I think it's very, very hard to overcome the parent/child dynamic when an adult kid lives at home. Sure - your house, your rules. Mine were pretty simple; keep the room clean, call if you aren't coming home. But when ours was last at home, at 21 years of age, I was still telling him to brush his teeth and getting mad at him if he called in sick to work! These are not things I should be thinking about with a grown son. NOT MY BUSINESS. But I could not stop "mothering" him. By the same token, depending on where you live, the cost of living is SO high! Here you can get a very decent one bedroom apartment for $450. You can get a decent HOUSE for $600. A room share isn't normal around here because renting a whole apartment is pretty affordable. My son currently lives with his girlfriend in her parent's home. She told me their rent for that house is $1,900/ mo! Colorado isn't the highest cost of living either. I know that he will easily pay $600-$700/mo for an apartment - if he's lucky. With that kind of rental costs, it's not affordable for a minimum wage person. Granted, the minimum wage there is $10.20 per hour, but other states are lower. Federal minimum wage averages currently $1,257/mo GROSS if you work 40 hours. So yes, two people could manage - one not so much. If they don't have reliable friends, what will they do for roommates? They don't want to get deadbeats living with them and be stuck with unpaid bills. IF our son ever came home again, it would have to be like last time. A set period of time, a job, and give us $ (rent) which we will hold until he is ready to move out. But I truly hope that never happens. We're better apart. He's a better person. I'm a better person. I can love him in a whole new way. I agree with RN. Cross that bridge when you come to it. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Ripped off
Top