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Sharing diagnosis with ghg
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<blockquote data-quote="buddy" data-source="post: 473616" data-attributes="member: 12886"><p>I do lie to Quin. I dont tell lies to hurt him but for example he couldn't sleep because it takes him so long to adjust to a new place and he just can't shake his worries. He wiil ask if there are bad guys in our city. I tell him no. Yet, he knows that there are police and He still believes in Santa, Tooth Fairy (though no more teeth to lose) and Easter Bunny. I am sure kids have told him the truth but he never says anything and he will say (if I have said no to something/everything in a store) can I add it to my list for Santa? I always say yes (he is also told Santa knows what is best for him) i can even say out loud, wow, I will have to tell santa you are doing so great etc. he will ask me to say things out loud to make sure Santa hears. I admit we have conflicts over this and there is no easy answer...he will doubt me sometimes because I will say maybe when the answer is for sure no...but maybe puts off a blow up until a safe place where i can handle it, or sometimes it just buys him time to be able to get into that head space so it is not all of a sudden a change of what HIS plan was. now that I am typing, I really lie toi him a lot. I tell him a different name if I am on the phone and I know he will go crazy if I tell who it is (like his teacher), I deny that there is a get together at my sisters if he is in a bad place and I just dont want to deal with the potential problems. If I said, yes, they are having dinner all together and you can't go because your behavior is not in control today he would panic and throw stuff etc. I dont feel badly about lying. But it doesn't always pay off and probably adds to his insecurity at times as he is learning/maturing and able to figure out some lies. I admit I probably shouldn't at times. It is often for my convenience and to prevent his going thru something.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="buddy, post: 473616, member: 12886"] I do lie to Quin. I dont tell lies to hurt him but for example he couldn't sleep because it takes him so long to adjust to a new place and he just can't shake his worries. He wiil ask if there are bad guys in our city. I tell him no. Yet, he knows that there are police and He still believes in Santa, Tooth Fairy (though no more teeth to lose) and Easter Bunny. I am sure kids have told him the truth but he never says anything and he will say (if I have said no to something/everything in a store) can I add it to my list for Santa? I always say yes (he is also told Santa knows what is best for him) i can even say out loud, wow, I will have to tell santa you are doing so great etc. he will ask me to say things out loud to make sure Santa hears. I admit we have conflicts over this and there is no easy answer...he will doubt me sometimes because I will say maybe when the answer is for sure no...but maybe puts off a blow up until a safe place where i can handle it, or sometimes it just buys him time to be able to get into that head space so it is not all of a sudden a change of what HIS plan was. now that I am typing, I really lie toi him a lot. I tell him a different name if I am on the phone and I know he will go crazy if I tell who it is (like his teacher), I deny that there is a get together at my sisters if he is in a bad place and I just dont want to deal with the potential problems. If I said, yes, they are having dinner all together and you can't go because your behavior is not in control today he would panic and throw stuff etc. I dont feel badly about lying. But it doesn't always pay off and probably adds to his insecurity at times as he is learning/maturing and able to figure out some lies. I admit I probably shouldn't at times. It is often for my convenience and to prevent his going thru something. [/QUOTE]
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