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Family of Origin
Sharing the very last time I will Sis break my heart.
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 652624" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Well, in the end, we learn that our families-of-origin don't define us. They do to one another, but they are so off the mark. Here my sis is calling me borderline yet reading my posts for what...years? She claims she can't stop, just as she can not give up her Difficult Child boyfriend, who is abusive to her. Sadly, I don't believe she can give up anyone. If this is all she can get of me, she will take it and she will forget that I am here, talking to others to heal, and pretend on her site that I am just randomly posting all about her. You'd think I gave identifying info about her. She needs to learn to let go of me, of her abusive boyfriend, of everybody toxic in her life (at least to whom she feels is toxic) or she will be 60 and too old to have had peaceful years. She is a young senior citizen now, not somebody with years to learn how to let go. I know she drives my dad nuts...lol. My only connection to ex-sis and ex-bro is Dad. Once he is gone, and I hope it is long from now, they will never hear from me again. I am even considering strongly, along with my husband and kids, refraining from the dirty looks and bad blood when he passes to the next and better world. WE can go to his graveside at any time, the next day, whatever, and grieve for him. Is it necessary to sit there at such a terrible time with people we do not want to even see? It's about Dad, and I'm not sure I want to divide my time wondering what Sis and Bro are thinking.</p><p></p><p>In his next life, Dad will understand.</p><p></p><p>And, Cedar, if you are reading this your were right. My sister wanted me to know that she knew about my mastectomy and wanted me to think that Dad told her, but he didn't. She read it here. You were so right that her text was just her brand of meanness. And, yes, she is mean...yet good at getting people she was mean to to forgive her (except me anymore). I really wonder what made up story she told my brother about why she was so mean to him when he was so sick and why she did not invite him to her wedding. I'm sure she did not tell him the truth about his being "gross" and ugly and looking like a girl and appearing gay.</p><p></p><p>To be honest, since my brother never married and never had a relationship at all, everyone assumed he was gay and we all talked about it, even Sis. My uncle's wife and uncle, who loved Golden Child, still thought he was gay. THe wife once told Sis, "Well, of course he's gay, isn't he?" ANd Sis told me. I am sorry I said it, although I don't think there is anything wrong with it. But the fact is, although he is peculiar and has not ever had a live in relationship, or any as far as I know, he is not gay.</p><p></p><p>If he had been a fly on the wall listening to my sister, would he still forgive her? I can't say. I don't care. I just know she fudges the truth to get out of trouble.</p><p></p><p>She can't fudge the truth to me anymore. I know she is uber-interested in my life in a sick way. I don't know why.</p><p></p><p>I am not interested in her life at all. But where she is at now did not surprise me. I did not think she would ever be good to herself and dump abusive boyfriend. So she is right where I expected her to be, asking, on the site, the same questions she asked me a year ago and years before that too.</p><p></p><p>They are to be pitied.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 652624, member: 1550"] Well, in the end, we learn that our families-of-origin don't define us. They do to one another, but they are so off the mark. Here my sis is calling me borderline yet reading my posts for what...years? She claims she can't stop, just as she can not give up her Difficult Child boyfriend, who is abusive to her. Sadly, I don't believe she can give up anyone. If this is all she can get of me, she will take it and she will forget that I am here, talking to others to heal, and pretend on her site that I am just randomly posting all about her. You'd think I gave identifying info about her. She needs to learn to let go of me, of her abusive boyfriend, of everybody toxic in her life (at least to whom she feels is toxic) or she will be 60 and too old to have had peaceful years. She is a young senior citizen now, not somebody with years to learn how to let go. I know she drives my dad nuts...lol. My only connection to ex-sis and ex-bro is Dad. Once he is gone, and I hope it is long from now, they will never hear from me again. I am even considering strongly, along with my husband and kids, refraining from the dirty looks and bad blood when he passes to the next and better world. WE can go to his graveside at any time, the next day, whatever, and grieve for him. Is it necessary to sit there at such a terrible time with people we do not want to even see? It's about Dad, and I'm not sure I want to divide my time wondering what Sis and Bro are thinking. In his next life, Dad will understand. And, Cedar, if you are reading this your were right. My sister wanted me to know that she knew about my mastectomy and wanted me to think that Dad told her, but he didn't. She read it here. You were so right that her text was just her brand of meanness. And, yes, she is mean...yet good at getting people she was mean to to forgive her (except me anymore). I really wonder what made up story she told my brother about why she was so mean to him when he was so sick and why she did not invite him to her wedding. I'm sure she did not tell him the truth about his being "gross" and ugly and looking like a girl and appearing gay. To be honest, since my brother never married and never had a relationship at all, everyone assumed he was gay and we all talked about it, even Sis. My uncle's wife and uncle, who loved Golden Child, still thought he was gay. THe wife once told Sis, "Well, of course he's gay, isn't he?" ANd Sis told me. I am sorry I said it, although I don't think there is anything wrong with it. But the fact is, although he is peculiar and has not ever had a live in relationship, or any as far as I know, he is not gay. If he had been a fly on the wall listening to my sister, would he still forgive her? I can't say. I don't care. I just know she fudges the truth to get out of trouble. She can't fudge the truth to me anymore. I know she is uber-interested in my life in a sick way. I don't know why. I am not interested in her life at all. But where she is at now did not surprise me. I did not think she would ever be good to herself and dump abusive boyfriend. So she is right where I expected her to be, asking, on the site, the same questions she asked me a year ago and years before that too. They are to be pitied. [/QUOTE]
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Sharing the very last time I will Sis break my heart.
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