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Substance Abuse
She says she's ready ...so how do I help?
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 743331" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>I did NOT get him on disability. He was helped after he left home by the County in which he lived. And he f-ed up because had he gotten on my account, and had he put in his application his early developmental issues he would have gotten a way higher amount. And they say we cannot appeal at this point. I am devastated. I blame myself for this, too. If I had been more proactive I could have helped him secure his life better.</p><p>But SWOT. I knew J's parents were drug users. Multiple drugs. </p><p></p><p>What I did not say in the earlier post is that the Infectious Disease Doctor to whom I brought him at Children's did not detect the Hepatitis. At 2 he could have been treated. Instead it was not detected until he was 19. It is appalling.</p><p></p><p>He was on Regional Center at risk when I got him. And then he was kicked off when he was about 3. They no longer felt he qualified. He did receive services all of the time he was with me, speech and language therapy, a therapist, behavioral nursery school, an IEP, later a psychiatrist. Nobody gave me a developmental diagnosis except ADHD. There was a question of mild Aspergers when he was in 6th grade, but the child psychiatrist later said any question of that was eliminated. That J did not have it.</p><p></p><p>I was somebody who always built on strengths in my own life. And truthfully, I had very, very few. I took what I had and I pushed and pushed. I did not push my son, but I did have expectations that he would live as I did I. Which I did not impose. But I believed he would live kind of like I did. I have the deepest pain and regret that I could not have done or been somebody that could have avoided all of this trauma and pain for us.</p><p></p><p>J's deepest pain and struggling came after he was diagnosed with the Hep B at 19 and it worsened at age 20. I am convinced too that when he traveled alone in 2006 to a foreign country, at age 18, where we had lived that something happened to him that he never disclosed. He had saved his Christmas job money to travel to see a girl. He left one person and came back another. I have always suspected that he may have been assaulted. Because he did not listen to me, to stay in a hostel. He stayed with the girl's family, and apparently he was robbed, ended up on the beach to sleep where there are lots of predators and then showed up at my friend's dance academy crying. After that is when the mood symptoms began. Until then he was hopeful, active and light-hearted. He was active in martial arts, at the gym, learning languages, etc. He had many friends. It went from day to night.</p><p></p><p>I had no expectation whatsoever that our lives would take the turn that they did. I had been in complete denial. Some of this could have been anticipated. After all. Because his life had already had imprinted so much. Hindsight is 20 20. And very painful.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 743331, member: 18958"] I did NOT get him on disability. He was helped after he left home by the County in which he lived. And he f-ed up because had he gotten on my account, and had he put in his application his early developmental issues he would have gotten a way higher amount. And they say we cannot appeal at this point. I am devastated. I blame myself for this, too. If I had been more proactive I could have helped him secure his life better. But SWOT. I knew J's parents were drug users. Multiple drugs. What I did not say in the earlier post is that the Infectious Disease Doctor to whom I brought him at Children's did not detect the Hepatitis. At 2 he could have been treated. Instead it was not detected until he was 19. It is appalling. He was on Regional Center at risk when I got him. And then he was kicked off when he was about 3. They no longer felt he qualified. He did receive services all of the time he was with me, speech and language therapy, a therapist, behavioral nursery school, an IEP, later a psychiatrist. Nobody gave me a developmental diagnosis except ADHD. There was a question of mild Aspergers when he was in 6th grade, but the child psychiatrist later said any question of that was eliminated. That J did not have it. I was somebody who always built on strengths in my own life. And truthfully, I had very, very few. I took what I had and I pushed and pushed. I did not push my son, but I did have expectations that he would live as I did I. Which I did not impose. But I believed he would live kind of like I did. I have the deepest pain and regret that I could not have done or been somebody that could have avoided all of this trauma and pain for us. J's deepest pain and struggling came after he was diagnosed with the Hep B at 19 and it worsened at age 20. I am convinced too that when he traveled alone in 2006 to a foreign country, at age 18, where we had lived that something happened to him that he never disclosed. He had saved his Christmas job money to travel to see a girl. He left one person and came back another. I have always suspected that he may have been assaulted. Because he did not listen to me, to stay in a hostel. He stayed with the girl's family, and apparently he was robbed, ended up on the beach to sleep where there are lots of predators and then showed up at my friend's dance academy crying. After that is when the mood symptoms began. Until then he was hopeful, active and light-hearted. He was active in martial arts, at the gym, learning languages, etc. He had many friends. It went from day to night. I had no expectation whatsoever that our lives would take the turn that they did. I had been in complete denial. Some of this could have been anticipated. After all. Because his life had already had imprinted so much. Hindsight is 20 20. And very painful. [/QUOTE]
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