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Substance Abuse
So confused
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 509570"><p>vligrl,</p><p></p><p>First you have come to the right place. Many of us are dealing with similar situations with kids of a similar age. It is definitely a very hard place to be and i am sorry you had to join us in this very tough situation.</p><p></p><p>Sounds to me like you are doing a lot of the right things. I would not let him use the car.... you know he is using and don't want him driving under the influence.... plus from my experience the car gives them more access to getting (and selling) drugs. </p><p></p><p>I think giving him a certain amout of time to find a job and move out if he is not going to school is a good idea. I think I would give him less than 3 months though. If he is using pot and other stuff regularly he probably won't do this and you will be faced with kicking him out. Very hard to do emotionally.... and you might want to check the laws in your state. Some states require you to do eviction proceedings and if that is the case you might want to start those when he drops out of college....so that after the time period is up he has to be out. Might also make him realize you are serious.</p><p></p><p>There really is nothing else you can do to prevent him from using. That is one of the really tough things, how powerless we are to protect our beloved kids from themselves! </p><p></p><p>I really recommend you find a good parents alanon group. I know the group I have found has been an amazing source of support and strength for me.</p><p></p><p>TL</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 509570"] vligrl, First you have come to the right place. Many of us are dealing with similar situations with kids of a similar age. It is definitely a very hard place to be and i am sorry you had to join us in this very tough situation. Sounds to me like you are doing a lot of the right things. I would not let him use the car.... you know he is using and don't want him driving under the influence.... plus from my experience the car gives them more access to getting (and selling) drugs. I think giving him a certain amout of time to find a job and move out if he is not going to school is a good idea. I think I would give him less than 3 months though. If he is using pot and other stuff regularly he probably won't do this and you will be faced with kicking him out. Very hard to do emotionally.... and you might want to check the laws in your state. Some states require you to do eviction proceedings and if that is the case you might want to start those when he drops out of college....so that after the time period is up he has to be out. Might also make him realize you are serious. There really is nothing else you can do to prevent him from using. That is one of the really tough things, how powerless we are to protect our beloved kids from themselves! I really recommend you find a good parents alanon group. I know the group I have found has been an amazing source of support and strength for me. TL [/QUOTE]
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