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Substance Abuse
Some thoughts
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<blockquote data-quote="Elsi" data-source="post: 739830" data-attributes="member: 23349"><p>Thanks for posting this, TL. These are some of the same questions and issues I am struggling with. What does hitting bottom mean, and what does it look like? Is hitting bottom always necessary for recovery? How strict do I have to be during this process - is it a strictly tough love approach, or are there times a softer approach works better? I should there anything I can do to nudge them in the right direction or speed up the process? How tough do I have to be?</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>I think this is what I’m learning too. That showing love and emotional support is always ok, but I can’t rescue or direct or enable. I have to let them find the way and face their own consequences for their choices. But I can tell them I still love them and I’m sorry those consequences are so hard. For my kids at least, remaining nonjudgmental seems to work better than going into ‘tough parent mode’ at their ages. At least they talk to me pretty openly, and aren’t stuck in teenage rebellion mode. They know what I think and they know I worry. C in particular seems to be moving towards more honesty and self reflection. S still seems so very lost to me, but all I know how to do is keep holding the door open and hope one day she will see it and walk through it. I’m afraid ‘bottom’ for her may be very far down indeed. </p><p></p><p>I hope your son continues to make progress in his recovery. It sounds like a great program.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Elsi, post: 739830, member: 23349"] Thanks for posting this, TL. These are some of the same questions and issues I am struggling with. What does hitting bottom mean, and what does it look like? Is hitting bottom always necessary for recovery? How strict do I have to be during this process - is it a strictly tough love approach, or are there times a softer approach works better? I should there anything I can do to nudge them in the right direction or speed up the process? How tough do I have to be? I think this is what I’m learning too. That showing love and emotional support is always ok, but I can’t rescue or direct or enable. I have to let them find the way and face their own consequences for their choices. But I can tell them I still love them and I’m sorry those consequences are so hard. For my kids at least, remaining nonjudgmental seems to work better than going into ‘tough parent mode’ at their ages. At least they talk to me pretty openly, and aren’t stuck in teenage rebellion mode. They know what I think and they know I worry. C in particular seems to be moving towards more honesty and self reflection. S still seems so very lost to me, but all I know how to do is keep holding the door open and hope one day she will see it and walk through it. I’m afraid ‘bottom’ for her may be very far down indeed. I hope your son continues to make progress in his recovery. It sounds like a great program. [/QUOTE]
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