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<blockquote data-quote="DarkwingPsyduck" data-source="post: 703952" data-attributes="member: 20267"><p>You'd be amazed at just how drastically different every aspect of an addict changes when in recovery... Early on, while I was still in withdrawal, I couldn't even imagine what normal was going to feel like. Hell, I was so sleep deprived, so sick, so worn down emotionally and mentally that I had serious doubts as to whether or not I could survive the ordeal. But as that started to slowly but surely lift, I was excited. The normal feeling would come in waves. It wasn't until that point that I started to appreciate just how bad I had gotten. </p><p></p><p>No longer relying on opiates just to be able to sleep, eat, or feel content still feels new to me. Almost 2 years sober. The pain of the experience of getting clean was so severe that there are songs I cannot listen to, and movies I cannot watch if they were something I enjoyed while actively using, or during withdrawal. It throws me right back to that point. Amazing how that happens. It reminds me of my complete and utter despair. The fact that this happens this long after the fact is testament to just how ingrained our addiction becomes. Almost like it is branded onto our souls. It is not something that goes away. And it probably shouldn't. I NEED to be able to remember that despair every once in a while, less I become complacent, or cocky.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DarkwingPsyduck, post: 703952, member: 20267"] You'd be amazed at just how drastically different every aspect of an addict changes when in recovery... Early on, while I was still in withdrawal, I couldn't even imagine what normal was going to feel like. Hell, I was so sleep deprived, so sick, so worn down emotionally and mentally that I had serious doubts as to whether or not I could survive the ordeal. But as that started to slowly but surely lift, I was excited. The normal feeling would come in waves. It wasn't until that point that I started to appreciate just how bad I had gotten. No longer relying on opiates just to be able to sleep, eat, or feel content still feels new to me. Almost 2 years sober. The pain of the experience of getting clean was so severe that there are songs I cannot listen to, and movies I cannot watch if they were something I enjoyed while actively using, or during withdrawal. It throws me right back to that point. Amazing how that happens. It reminds me of my complete and utter despair. The fact that this happens this long after the fact is testament to just how ingrained our addiction becomes. Almost like it is branded onto our souls. It is not something that goes away. And it probably shouldn't. I NEED to be able to remember that despair every once in a while, less I become complacent, or cocky. [/QUOTE]
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