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<blockquote data-quote="New Leaf" data-source="post: 765495" data-attributes="member: 19522">Thank you Beta. I’m still on the fence about talking with her. If I do, I will keep it brief and just let her know that I love her. No sense getting stuck in circular talk. &nbsp;I don’t think she injects. I think she smokes it. She has her teeth, but her face has aged. When she is using, she becomes quite thin. In recovery, she is prone to weight gain, which she hates. I’m not giving up on her quitting, I know she can if she puts her mind to it. I think at this point she is still “defrosting” as my friend said after I texted him. He also said that at least she’s being honest and knows herself better than anyone. Unfortunately most of the meth users I am aware of are still using after many years. &nbsp;I’m so sorry Copa. That is very difficult to hear. I wish he was agreeable to seek medical care. &nbsp;I can only continue to hope and pray that she can one day find herself. She is inside there somewhere buried under the drug use. I feel so for you Copa. It is the same for Rain. Her health has deteriorated. She won’t help herself. I think of her often, but have to rely on Gods will. There are days when I feel destroyed as well, but I have to get up and take care of my granddaughter. She looks remarkably like her mother, it takes peoples breath away. So far, she is finding her way. She will not have anything to do with Tornado, as long as she is using. When she is in rehab, she is very cautious and reserved. Although she does not talk about it, I know it hurts her deeply when her mom relapses. Sigh. There is nothing left to do but continue to build our toolbox and strengthen ourselves. Roll with the punches, soothe our wounded hearts and keep going.</blockquote>

[QUOTE="New Leaf, post: 765495, member: 19522"] Thank you Beta. I’m still on the fence about talking with her. If I do, I will keep it brief and just let her know that I love her. No sense getting stuck in circular talk. I don’t think she injects. I think she smokes it. She has her teeth, but her face has aged. When she is using, she becomes quite thin. In recovery, she is prone to weight gain, which she hates. I’m not giving up on her quitting, I know she can if she puts her mind to it. I think at this point she is still “defrosting” as my friend said after I texted him. He also said that at least she’s being honest and knows herself better than anyone. Unfortunately most of the meth users I am aware of are still using after many years. I’m so sorry Copa. That is very difficult to hear. I wish he was agreeable to seek medical care. I can only continue to hope and pray that she can one day find herself. She is inside there somewhere buried under the drug use. I feel so for you Copa. It is the same for Rain. Her health has deteriorated. She won’t help herself. I think of her often, but have to rely on Gods will. There are days when I feel destroyed as well, but I have to get up and take care of my granddaughter. She looks remarkably like her mother, it takes peoples breath away. So far, she is finding her way. She will not have anything to do with Tornado, as long as she is using. When she is in rehab, she is very cautious and reserved. Although she does not talk about it, I know it hurts her deeply when her mom relapses. Sigh. There is nothing left to do but continue to build our toolbox and strengthen ourselves. Roll with the punches, soothe our wounded hearts and keep going. [/QUOTE]

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