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Still detached with love, and it's great
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<blockquote data-quote="LauraH" data-source="post: 753231" data-attributes="member: 22877"><p>Update: It may sound like an oxymoron to say I'm proud of my son when he's relapsing and asking people for money. But in a strange way, I am. Proud despite the relapse because he's taking steps to get back to recovery. Proud despite the fact he's asking for money because he managed to find a way to get the money with no help from me. Proud and relieved that he didn't react or respond negatively or angrily at my "no". He actually didn't get my FB message telling him I couldn't help him, and he texted me to say never mind, that a friend of his (his boss, actually) is loaning him the money. In my book these are tiny victories, because this time a year ago he wasn't interested in getting clean and when I had to say no to anything I got an angry tirade about what a terrible mother and human being I am. </p><p></p><p>Every little improvement, whether permanent or temporary, is a step in the right direction and gives me hope for his future. And best of all...back to the detachment...no matter what happens I won't be pacing the floor, tossing and turning when I should be sleeping, throwing money away on a lost cause, or beating myself up for what I coulda woulda shoulda done in the past and in the present.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="LauraH, post: 753231, member: 22877"] Update: It may sound like an oxymoron to say I'm proud of my son when he's relapsing and asking people for money. But in a strange way, I am. Proud despite the relapse because he's taking steps to get back to recovery. Proud despite the fact he's asking for money because he managed to find a way to get the money with no help from me. Proud and relieved that he didn't react or respond negatively or angrily at my "no". He actually didn't get my FB message telling him I couldn't help him, and he texted me to say never mind, that a friend of his (his boss, actually) is loaning him the money. In my book these are tiny victories, because this time a year ago he wasn't interested in getting clean and when I had to say no to anything I got an angry tirade about what a terrible mother and human being I am. Every little improvement, whether permanent or temporary, is a step in the right direction and gives me hope for his future. And best of all...back to the detachment...no matter what happens I won't be pacing the floor, tossing and turning when I should be sleeping, throwing money away on a lost cause, or beating myself up for what I coulda woulda shoulda done in the past and in the present. [/QUOTE]
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