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General Parenting
Teens' Defiance Wrecking Our Home
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 719539" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>The good kids/bad kids does not work with disturbed kids.</p><p></p><p>Also I feel it is best never to refer to our kids as bad. Ever. It helps nothing and causes resentment. I have never ever referred to even my difficult kids as bad. Why make them feel intristically flawed? My Mom called me bad. It certainly made me worse and if she tried to deny me something, I found a way to get it anyway...plus i stopped trusting her so she knew nothing about me and our relationship was torn forever. in my opinion you dont tell kids they are bad, stupid, useless...you get my drift. Its not as simple as good or bad. These twins are damaged and probably much of it is due to past trauma.</p><p></p><p>If it were that simple to correct troubled behavior, nobody would need this forum. One plus one does not equal two with "differenly wired" kids. When does this simple taking of toys change very troubled kids??? If it did we would have a simple answer.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 719539, member: 1550"] The good kids/bad kids does not work with disturbed kids. Also I feel it is best never to refer to our kids as bad. Ever. It helps nothing and causes resentment. I have never ever referred to even my difficult kids as bad. Why make them feel intristically flawed? My Mom called me bad. It certainly made me worse and if she tried to deny me something, I found a way to get it anyway...plus i stopped trusting her so she knew nothing about me and our relationship was torn forever. in my opinion you dont tell kids they are bad, stupid, useless...you get my drift. Its not as simple as good or bad. These twins are damaged and probably much of it is due to past trauma. If it were that simple to correct troubled behavior, nobody would need this forum. One plus one does not equal two with "differenly wired" kids. When does this simple taking of toys change very troubled kids??? If it did we would have a simple answer. [/QUOTE]
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