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the ball is in his court??
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 722881" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>new leaf. thank you. i am feeling a great deal of solace and support from your posts. </p><p></p><p>just a short response. i did not tell my son he could stay more than a limited time. i am not ready to accept him unconditionally. and i have no interest anymore in trying to impose conditions. i have no illusion that there is any more buy in now, then there was before.</p><p></p><p>so in this sense our situations are similar.</p><p></p><p>i plan on letting my son come up with what he will do.</p><p></p><p>we have another house that is a rental. there is the option of letting him live there (with m's brother in law who is stable and working and middle aged.) but i will not tolerate the marijuana. And i doubt he will give it up. and a key thing for us is productivity. and we will not give him work anymore for him to shirk. so i have little hope this will be an enduring thing.</p><p></p><p>if he wants to live one hundred percent on his terms it will not be near me. so same thing as you.</p><p></p><p>and i sink too. except for me there is terror which is as great or greater than the despair.</p><p></p><p>new leaf. i see your stance as loving, realistic and hopeful.</p><p></p><p>do you have teen/adult challenge where you live? when tornado asks again to come home can you give her that option? that is the program rn's son is in. it has an adult component. i think it is free.</p><p></p><p>ps. i will hug him.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 722881, member: 18958"] new leaf. thank you. i am feeling a great deal of solace and support from your posts. just a short response. i did not tell my son he could stay more than a limited time. i am not ready to accept him unconditionally. and i have no interest anymore in trying to impose conditions. i have no illusion that there is any more buy in now, then there was before. so in this sense our situations are similar. i plan on letting my son come up with what he will do. we have another house that is a rental. there is the option of letting him live there (with m's brother in law who is stable and working and middle aged.) but i will not tolerate the marijuana. And i doubt he will give it up. and a key thing for us is productivity. and we will not give him work anymore for him to shirk. so i have little hope this will be an enduring thing. if he wants to live one hundred percent on his terms it will not be near me. so same thing as you. and i sink too. except for me there is terror which is as great or greater than the despair. new leaf. i see your stance as loving, realistic and hopeful. do you have teen/adult challenge where you live? when tornado asks again to come home can you give her that option? that is the program rn's son is in. it has an adult component. i think it is free. ps. i will hug him. [/QUOTE]
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the ball is in his court??
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