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Parent Emeritus
the ball is in his court??
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<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 723064" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>I assume he knew there would be boundaries when you made him the offer to come back; that you didn't just say, "Come home and live here until you have your act together" and nothing more. </p><p></p><p>He <em>knew</em> it would be for a limited amount of time.</p><p></p><p>My suggestion would be to give him a limited amount of time to kind of "relax" and think. "You have ___ weeks to make a plan on what you are going to do. You can (1) stay here under the conditions <em>you knew</em> would be imposed - no drugs and do something productive, be that work, classes, whatever, or (2) you can move on. If at the end of ___ weeks, you <em>are</em> being productive and staying away from the pot, then we'll see if you want to stay longer. If you aren't - you best have chosen option 2 and made a plan, because you'll have to go. Under either option, you will NOT bring drugs into this house." Really, I don't know that I'd make him test. Pot especially lasts a long time in the system doesn't it? How will you know that he's not testing positive from the time he was gone? But that's me. </p><p></p><p>I guess what I'm saying is maybe give him a week or two to get his act together and make his choice. He knew he couldn't just come back and do whatever he wanted, right?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 723064, member: 17309"] I assume he knew there would be boundaries when you made him the offer to come back; that you didn't just say, "Come home and live here until you have your act together" and nothing more. He [I]knew[/I] it would be for a limited amount of time. My suggestion would be to give him a limited amount of time to kind of "relax" and think. "You have ___ weeks to make a plan on what you are going to do. You can (1) stay here under the conditions [I]you knew[/I] would be imposed - no drugs and do something productive, be that work, classes, whatever, or (2) you can move on. If at the end of ___ weeks, you [I]are[/I] being productive and staying away from the pot, then we'll see if you want to stay longer. If you aren't - you best have chosen option 2 and made a plan, because you'll have to go. Under either option, you will NOT bring drugs into this house." Really, I don't know that I'd make him test. Pot especially lasts a long time in the system doesn't it? How will you know that he's not testing positive from the time he was gone? But that's me. I guess what I'm saying is maybe give him a week or two to get his act together and make his choice. He knew he couldn't just come back and do whatever he wanted, right? [/QUOTE]
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the ball is in his court??
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