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Parent Emeritus
The Result of the Latest Missing Person Report
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<blockquote data-quote="New Leaf" data-source="post: 765756" data-attributes="member: 19522"><p>Hi Beta,</p><p>It’s so difficult to not know where, what, why, how our adult children are doing. Then again, it’s also difficult to know those things and process the answers. I am sorry for your heartache. I am glad that the officer was kind enough to call you and let you know that he had Josh with him. Although your son did not reply to your offer to help, your message in love was there. </p><p></p><p></p><p>I think this is the part that our minds and hearts wrestle with the most. The good times and the difficult times. The memories that pop up with familiar places and songs, or just appear out of the blue. I had a task to do that I avoided for years, my photo albums needed to be redone, all those pictures just haunted me. Then I realized that it was a gift to raise my girls up. That we did have some wonderful times together when they were growing up. I was able to finally go</p><p>through those old albums with a different perspective of gratitude for the good times, rather than lamenting what is. I believe we go through intense grieving over the lifestyle and choices of our wayward adult children. It is different than the finality of losing a loved one in death. It is a lingering, persistent grief that waxes and wanes. It has been helpful for me when those feelings hit hard, to say a prayer and ask God to watch over my two. Writing here helps too, most of what I write is a reminder to me to stay the course. When I am troubled by new events, the support here is tremendously helpful. </p><p></p><p>I think you and your husband are approaching this in a most rational way. Tornado once asked me why I don’t go and seek out her sister. I know it is not a safe area for me to be. Unfortunately, there has been a rise in violent attacks, I do not want to put myself in a vulnerable position. Our safety is important. </p><p></p><p>Me too, Beta, I will always love my children and hope and pray for their recovery. I hope you are feeling better each day. Prayers going up for all of us who are met with the challenge of learning to live our best lives while processing the reality of our wayward adult children’s choices. It is not an easy journey, that’s for sure. Hang in there. </p><p>(((Hugs)))</p><p>New Leaf</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="New Leaf, post: 765756, member: 19522"] Hi Beta, It’s so difficult to not know where, what, why, how our adult children are doing. Then again, it’s also difficult to know those things and process the answers. I am sorry for your heartache. I am glad that the officer was kind enough to call you and let you know that he had Josh with him. Although your son did not reply to your offer to help, your message in love was there. I think this is the part that our minds and hearts wrestle with the most. The good times and the difficult times. The memories that pop up with familiar places and songs, or just appear out of the blue. I had a task to do that I avoided for years, my photo albums needed to be redone, all those pictures just haunted me. Then I realized that it was a gift to raise my girls up. That we did have some wonderful times together when they were growing up. I was able to finally go through those old albums with a different perspective of gratitude for the good times, rather than lamenting what is. I believe we go through intense grieving over the lifestyle and choices of our wayward adult children. It is different than the finality of losing a loved one in death. It is a lingering, persistent grief that waxes and wanes. It has been helpful for me when those feelings hit hard, to say a prayer and ask God to watch over my two. Writing here helps too, most of what I write is a reminder to me to stay the course. When I am troubled by new events, the support here is tremendously helpful. I think you and your husband are approaching this in a most rational way. Tornado once asked me why I don’t go and seek out her sister. I know it is not a safe area for me to be. Unfortunately, there has been a rise in violent attacks, I do not want to put myself in a vulnerable position. Our safety is important. Me too, Beta, I will always love my children and hope and pray for their recovery. I hope you are feeling better each day. Prayers going up for all of us who are met with the challenge of learning to live our best lives while processing the reality of our wayward adult children’s choices. It is not an easy journey, that’s for sure. Hang in there. (((Hugs))) New Leaf [/QUOTE]
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