Hello everyone. The last time I posted I predicted that my stepson would leave his latest rehab when the opportunity arose eg. when benefits payday rolled around. And what do you know..........the day after payday he walked out, leaving all his stuff behind, and saying he was done with the place, although he would not give a specific reason why. If he had stayed he would have been eligible for their supported housing / sober living program. He only had 7 more days to go.
He had to pay us back what we copayed for this rehab (the agreement being that if he saw it through we wouldn't ask him to pay it back.) So after just a few days out he has just a few hundred dollars left, if that. A few nights at a hotel and now he's back on the streets, and telling my husband all sorts of cockamamie stories to try and get money.
As I had suspected, he was not ready to change. He simply had nowhere else to go. And after getting beaten up and allegedly molested by a drug dealer, three weeks later he has put himself back in the same situation.
Some comments I have read on the forum lately have rung true with me. Someone said they did not think the drugs had as much to do with their child's continued fall as the fact that they wanted to be in control; that they felt they were smarter than everyone else. I can relate to this. My son simply cannot abide being required to do things that he does not care to do, even when doing these things offers a clear path to a better future. I think he has a different lifestyle now, one that we do not understand. He is becoming a street person in his ways, his thinking, his approach to the world. The thought that he and he alone has made this choice has made it easier for me to detach just that little bit more over this past weekend. My husband is trying, but he struggles, which I completely respect and understand.
We have been waiting on a useless Social Security agency / contractor to find housing for a year. But my husband actually said he doesn't know if his son could handle even that. He would have dodgy friends coming and going, drugs, etc., and the place would be trashed in short order. If he had just a little more money coming in he could afford a long stay hotel on a permanent basis, but the money he has just runs through his hands, and he refuses to work. Just the other night we were blamed for 'making him' sleep outside in the park because we would not give him money.
Thank you for listening all. Hugs.