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<blockquote data-quote="tryingtobestrong" data-source="post: 758016" data-attributes="member: 22817"><p>I think I mentioned he was looking for a new job because he feels he deserves more money and also because his company made them take a wage cut until the end of the year. The current job he is there almost 4 years. Does a great job but with where he lives the cost of living is alot higher than other branches of the company. The company pays them the same rate no matter what state their office is in. </p><p>I had looked at the company reviews of where he had his interview today and just suggested he look at them as well and make a very sound decision on the move if he is offered the job. With his current job he has FMLA to protect him shall he need it again for rehab... This has saved him twice over the past 3 years. That is a big deal to me. Part of me feels that if he doesn't have this safety net than maybe he will stay on the right path for awhile, part of me is scared. Like all of you said, it is his path. I need to be strong and let him know I can't help anymore.</p><p>He sent me a text stating he did not like that I was downgrading his opportunity.... that he can't pay rent with his current pay .... that where he lives has an extremely high cost of living.... I don't feel I downgraded his opportunity and I told him that. I told him to make sure he thinks this through. Yes, he deserves more money for what he does. </p><p>I also reminded him that he had just said he will be able to save up now since he can't smoke weed anymore due to it making him sick... Guess what? No reply... </p><p>I know he is most likely back to drinking and weed. Charges all of his bills, pays cash for the booze/weed.. Credit cards get maxed out and he calls my dad for help. This happened twice now... My dad said no more so I hope he stands firm.</p><p></p><p>Someone mentioned on another post about writing a journal and putting in all of what has happened over the years. I know that when I read all of it, it will make me stronger and angry and want to stand up for myself. My problem is when he manipulates me, I cave. I need to be strong.</p><p>I am going kayaking tomorrow with a friend and have started reading a book. Thank you all.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="tryingtobestrong, post: 758016, member: 22817"] I think I mentioned he was looking for a new job because he feels he deserves more money and also because his company made them take a wage cut until the end of the year. The current job he is there almost 4 years. Does a great job but with where he lives the cost of living is alot higher than other branches of the company. The company pays them the same rate no matter what state their office is in. I had looked at the company reviews of where he had his interview today and just suggested he look at them as well and make a very sound decision on the move if he is offered the job. With his current job he has FMLA to protect him shall he need it again for rehab... This has saved him twice over the past 3 years. That is a big deal to me. Part of me feels that if he doesn't have this safety net than maybe he will stay on the right path for awhile, part of me is scared. Like all of you said, it is his path. I need to be strong and let him know I can't help anymore. He sent me a text stating he did not like that I was downgrading his opportunity.... that he can't pay rent with his current pay .... that where he lives has an extremely high cost of living.... I don't feel I downgraded his opportunity and I told him that. I told him to make sure he thinks this through. Yes, he deserves more money for what he does. I also reminded him that he had just said he will be able to save up now since he can't smoke weed anymore due to it making him sick... Guess what? No reply... I know he is most likely back to drinking and weed. Charges all of his bills, pays cash for the booze/weed.. Credit cards get maxed out and he calls my dad for help. This happened twice now... My dad said no more so I hope he stands firm. Someone mentioned on another post about writing a journal and putting in all of what has happened over the years. I know that when I read all of it, it will make me stronger and angry and want to stand up for myself. My problem is when he manipulates me, I cave. I need to be strong. I am going kayaking tomorrow with a friend and have started reading a book. Thank you all. [/QUOTE]
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