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Time to update on easy child...
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<blockquote data-quote="AnnieO" data-source="post: 419371" data-attributes="member: 6705"><p>3S...</p><p> </p><p>I know how hard it is - I have been there. I don't <em>think</em> Onyxx is cutting any more - but I could not swear it. And after finding yet more slutty underwear... Sigh.</p><p> </p><p>The first was hidden in a box with a babydoll. We burned it - UGH - it looked as if it hadn't been washed. Onyxx was just-then 12. We never mentioned it to her, and we had started going through her room on a regular basis because things were disappearing, she was writing on things (walls, mirrors, shower, carpet, furniture...) and urinating in her garbage can then swearing the cats did it (though we kept her bedroom door closed when she was not there AND her garbage can had a lid).</p><p> </p><p>I somehow clued in to her cutting early on but could not prove it. Talked to her about it. Found articles online for her to read (and some for her not to read). However, with the sexual abuse history, I could not look at her body - she threw a FIT if we so much as knocked on her door while she was changing. Not as much anymore, but I haven't seen all of her since she was 9 and changing in the living room. (Which we had to discourage... LOL!)</p><p> </p><p>About the cell phone. Wherever you keep it, keep the battery and/or SIM card in a different place. Seriously. Onyxx stole her phone back at one point - and returned it two days later, because it wouldn't work. (However, it was stolen from husband's nightstand, and returned to my vanity... REALLY?)</p><p> </p><p>I agree with the apology to difficult child. And also with the assuming easy child is lying until independently corroborated. It hoovers, big time, but it's a reality we have to live with.</p><p> </p><p>Cutting is the most prevalent (at least to our knowledge), but there was a time in high school that I did hurt myself - brush, curling iron, that sort of thing. I had stipple-bruises on my arms from the brush. It helped to know I was in control there. With difficult child... easy child may feel out of control.</p><p> </p><p>Hugs, hon... Let us know how things progress.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="AnnieO, post: 419371, member: 6705"] 3S... I know how hard it is - I have been there. I don't [I]think[/I] Onyxx is cutting any more - but I could not swear it. And after finding yet more slutty underwear... Sigh. The first was hidden in a box with a babydoll. We burned it - UGH - it looked as if it hadn't been washed. Onyxx was just-then 12. We never mentioned it to her, and we had started going through her room on a regular basis because things were disappearing, she was writing on things (walls, mirrors, shower, carpet, furniture...) and urinating in her garbage can then swearing the cats did it (though we kept her bedroom door closed when she was not there AND her garbage can had a lid). I somehow clued in to her cutting early on but could not prove it. Talked to her about it. Found articles online for her to read (and some for her not to read). However, with the sexual abuse history, I could not look at her body - she threw a FIT if we so much as knocked on her door while she was changing. Not as much anymore, but I haven't seen all of her since she was 9 and changing in the living room. (Which we had to discourage... LOL!) About the cell phone. Wherever you keep it, keep the battery and/or SIM card in a different place. Seriously. Onyxx stole her phone back at one point - and returned it two days later, because it wouldn't work. (However, it was stolen from husband's nightstand, and returned to my vanity... REALLY?) I agree with the apology to difficult child. And also with the assuming easy child is lying until independently corroborated. It hoovers, big time, but it's a reality we have to live with. Cutting is the most prevalent (at least to our knowledge), but there was a time in high school that I did hurt myself - brush, curling iron, that sort of thing. I had stipple-bruises on my arms from the brush. It helped to know I was in control there. With difficult child... easy child may feel out of control. Hugs, hon... Let us know how things progress. [/QUOTE]
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