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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 430859" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>May I make a practical suggestion? Change your coding system to give him a different initial. Because we use "I" to mean ourselves, it is sometimes confusing. You shouldn't (for your sakes) use any real initials anyway, or real names. Anonymity here is important especially if you ever have conflict over your child (with school, with family, with health professionals etc). You need to know that someone won't Google your names and find what you are writing here.</p><p></p><p>Welcome, sorry you need to be here but it does sound like there is a lot going on.</p><p></p><p>I'm sorry to have to suggest this, given how much you are dealing with - but please be aware that if a child has an underlying disorder anyway, they are actually more vulnerable to abuse. For example, a child who is less socially capable is therefore more easily led into abuse and also has a lot more difficulty identifying that something is inappropriate. It also impacts physical disability - a friend of mine was regularly sexually molested as a child and teenager, by older boys at the local swimming pool. They assumed they could get away with it because she was thought to be as mentally incompetent as her body was crippled. She put up with the abuse because she needed the weekly swimming exercise to build up her weak muscles. She told me she would just wait until the boys had finished each week, so she could then get on with her exercise.</p><p></p><p>So it is possible that on top of PTSD, there may be a totally unrelated, unknown problem that risks getting masked by the known.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 430859, member: 1991"] May I make a practical suggestion? Change your coding system to give him a different initial. Because we use "I" to mean ourselves, it is sometimes confusing. You shouldn't (for your sakes) use any real initials anyway, or real names. Anonymity here is important especially if you ever have conflict over your child (with school, with family, with health professionals etc). You need to know that someone won't Google your names and find what you are writing here. Welcome, sorry you need to be here but it does sound like there is a lot going on. I'm sorry to have to suggest this, given how much you are dealing with - but please be aware that if a child has an underlying disorder anyway, they are actually more vulnerable to abuse. For example, a child who is less socially capable is therefore more easily led into abuse and also has a lot more difficulty identifying that something is inappropriate. It also impacts physical disability - a friend of mine was regularly sexually molested as a child and teenager, by older boys at the local swimming pool. They assumed they could get away with it because she was thought to be as mentally incompetent as her body was crippled. She put up with the abuse because she needed the weekly swimming exercise to build up her weak muscles. She told me she would just wait until the boys had finished each week, so she could then get on with her exercise. So it is possible that on top of PTSD, there may be a totally unrelated, unknown problem that risks getting masked by the known. Marg [/QUOTE]
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