Is there a Wraparound type service available to you where you could get a number of hours per week of TSS (therapeutic staff support) help? A TSS would be one-on-one with your middle difficult child and would be able to supervise closely to avoid more acting out in the daycare. We went through a few TSS's and, while they weren't as well educated as I would have hoped, they were more informed than the average nanny or babysitter. Plus they reported back to the doctor and team each week and got feedback and suggestions that way. I would also recommend the book 'When Love is Not Enough: A Guide to Parenting Children with Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD)' by Nancy Thomas. It is right on in its advice, just a great book. It helped me a lot with difficult child, even though he wasn't formally diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) (one doctor did think that was his diagnosis, however). It might give you some support while you wait for evaluations etc.
