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Ugh... I hate having to say no
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<blockquote data-quote="Tanya M" data-source="post: 749246" data-attributes="member: 18516"><p>Just because you have an extra bed does not mean you are obligated to let her use it. You are correct, it would not be healthy for your marriage, but it's also not healthy for you.</p><p></p><p></p><p>I find this is a very common thing with our difficult adult children. When their lives are going the way they want we rarely, if ever hear from them. It's when they run out of money or other people's graciousness that they seek us out hoping we will give into their demands.</p><p></p><p></p><p>Some of what you have described could very well be mental illness and I'm glad you have reached out to NAMI. It also may be drug induced. My son likes to use LSD because, as he claims, "it opens his mind". He has had hallucinations and also shares the idealism that he is "healing the planet", that he will never be a "slave to the man - work", he's a sovereign citizen and laws do not apply to him.</p><p>Getting a good diagnosis of mental illness is not easy when drugs are involved.</p><p></p><p>I've been at this a long time. My son is 37 and homeless / drifting / couch surfing, etc... I have accepted that this is what his life will be. I don't like it but it's his choice. I leave him to live his life and I move on to live my life.</p><p></p><p>I know it's hard to go through this. I know how much heartache it causes. Be good to yourself by making sure you are taking time to do things that bring you joy.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tanya M, post: 749246, member: 18516"] Just because you have an extra bed does not mean you are obligated to let her use it. You are correct, it would not be healthy for your marriage, but it's also not healthy for you. I find this is a very common thing with our difficult adult children. When their lives are going the way they want we rarely, if ever hear from them. It's when they run out of money or other people's graciousness that they seek us out hoping we will give into their demands. Some of what you have described could very well be mental illness and I'm glad you have reached out to NAMI. It also may be drug induced. My son likes to use LSD because, as he claims, "it opens his mind". He has had hallucinations and also shares the idealism that he is "healing the planet", that he will never be a "slave to the man - work", he's a sovereign citizen and laws do not apply to him. Getting a good diagnosis of mental illness is not easy when drugs are involved. I've been at this a long time. My son is 37 and homeless / drifting / couch surfing, etc... I have accepted that this is what his life will be. I don't like it but it's his choice. I leave him to live his life and I move on to live my life. I know it's hard to go through this. I know how much heartache it causes. Be good to yourself by making sure you are taking time to do things that bring you joy. [/QUOTE]
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Ugh... I hate having to say no
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