Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Ultimatum
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 738789" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>I wrote a big long reply but I lost all of it. I even wrote an outline. This was among the weirder stories I have read here. She is a real nut. I am sorry to be so blunt. But I have never felt so compelled to write an outline in response to a post. It even had bullet points.</p><p></p><p>The gist of my lost reply: this woman is a piece of work.</p><p></p><p>The only way to do this is to not take her personally. She cannot insist upon what she asks, that you justify relationships to her. She and no other person has the right to request that.</p><p></p><p>But the thing is, you want a relationship with grandson and you want to protect him to the extent you can.</p><p></p><p>I would suggest you stay engaged, and try as best you can, to stay focused, in the present, non judgmental, and accepting. I do not believe that Buddha himself could have done this with this lady, but you might.</p><p></p><p>Anybody would resent her. She is controlling. Actually, she is unhinged in my view. But these kinds of evaluations will only make it harder for you.</p><p></p><p>I would try as best I can to stay focused on the well-being of my grandson, and keep her peripheral. She is just the long, disgusting drive you have to take to get to him. Any whack job thing she says, I would try to ignore. Just focus on him. If she demands you respond say, <em>I love you, Honey, and I love him (her). Period. </em>Try to turn every single thing she says around to the positive.</p><p></p><p>And when she says nut job dramatic stuff like ultimatums, I would consider the source. She is only trying to be abusive to you. This is a power play. I would be in a great deal of pain, because I would know that my grandson had to deal with this too. She reminds me a lot of Swots ex daughter in law, mother of Swots grandson. They have a lot of similarities.</p><p></p><p>The hard thing will be the very real and legitimate responses you have to her intrusive, irresponsible, problematic and selfish behavior. But the reality is your grandson will need you, so that he does not have to deal with her alone. That is the really unfortunate situation you find yourself in. I would try to make it my priority, and try to have a great deal of self-compassion, because I would be doing a very hard thing.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 738789, member: 18958"] I wrote a big long reply but I lost all of it. I even wrote an outline. This was among the weirder stories I have read here. She is a real nut. I am sorry to be so blunt. But I have never felt so compelled to write an outline in response to a post. It even had bullet points. The gist of my lost reply: this woman is a piece of work. The only way to do this is to not take her personally. She cannot insist upon what she asks, that you justify relationships to her. She and no other person has the right to request that. But the thing is, you want a relationship with grandson and you want to protect him to the extent you can. I would suggest you stay engaged, and try as best you can, to stay focused, in the present, non judgmental, and accepting. I do not believe that Buddha himself could have done this with this lady, but you might. Anybody would resent her. She is controlling. Actually, she is unhinged in my view. But these kinds of evaluations will only make it harder for you. I would try as best I can to stay focused on the well-being of my grandson, and keep her peripheral. She is just the long, disgusting drive you have to take to get to him. Any whack job thing she says, I would try to ignore. Just focus on him. If she demands you respond say, [I]I love you, Honey, and I love him (her). Period. [/I]Try to turn every single thing she says around to the positive. And when she says nut job dramatic stuff like ultimatums, I would consider the source. She is only trying to be abusive to you. This is a power play. I would be in a great deal of pain, because I would know that my grandson had to deal with this too. She reminds me a lot of Swots ex daughter in law, mother of Swots grandson. They have a lot of similarities. The hard thing will be the very real and legitimate responses you have to her intrusive, irresponsible, problematic and selfish behavior. But the reality is your grandson will need you, so that he does not have to deal with her alone. That is the really unfortunate situation you find yourself in. I would try to make it my priority, and try to have a great deal of self-compassion, because I would be doing a very hard thing. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Ultimatum
Top