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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 703973" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>I forgot to make the point I wanted to make initially in my preceding post.</p><p></p><p>Albatross. Your son (our own) are AMBIVALENT, too. Witness his own progression, this week. But first: he wants to be a man. He wants to be self-determining. He wants to have autonomy. He wants to no longer be Mama's baby. But he is conflicted. It is not that he is afraid to leave you. It is that part of him wants to stay. Close to you. In your ambiance and orbit. Last week my son said to me: I don't feel alone when I am at home. Even if we don't talk.</p><p></p><p>But they want to be men, too. They are AMBIVALENT. Do you see, Albatross, that the manner in which you handled the interactions, with prayer rather than with control or taking charge, or some kind of saving, enabled your son to act as a man, and to choose to be empowered. You did that, Albatross. And instead of enabling him to renounce adult responsibilities, you did the opposite. (While the quote below is pure Albatross, the inserted underlines, and words within parens are my own.)</p><p></p><p>I hope I have not offended. I am only learning how to view my own life and myself in spiritual terms. It is giving me great relief to no longer feel as if I am responsible for everything, everywhere, and conversely that everything is my fault, my failure. I am gaining more hope and self-control with my son, as I learn to surrender and not to fight.</p><p></p><p>This is not about any religion, in my case. It is about learning a different way to be and to see myself in relation to life.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 703973, member: 18958"] I forgot to make the point I wanted to make initially in my preceding post. Albatross. Your son (our own) are AMBIVALENT, too. Witness his own progression, this week. But first: he wants to be a man. He wants to be self-determining. He wants to have autonomy. He wants to no longer be Mama's baby. But he is conflicted. It is not that he is afraid to leave you. It is that part of him wants to stay. Close to you. In your ambiance and orbit. Last week my son said to me: I don't feel alone when I am at home. Even if we don't talk. But they want to be men, too. They are AMBIVALENT. Do you see, Albatross, that the manner in which you handled the interactions, with prayer rather than with control or taking charge, or some kind of saving, enabled your son to act as a man, and to choose to be empowered. You did that, Albatross. And instead of enabling him to renounce adult responsibilities, you did the opposite. (While the quote below is pure Albatross, the inserted underlines, and words within parens are my own.) I hope I have not offended. I am only learning how to view my own life and myself in spiritual terms. It is giving me great relief to no longer feel as if I am responsible for everything, everywhere, and conversely that everything is my fault, my failure. I am gaining more hope and self-control with my son, as I learn to surrender and not to fight. This is not about any religion, in my case. It is about learning a different way to be and to see myself in relation to life. [/QUOTE]
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