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Parent Emeritus
Update... I took advice from many and it worked
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 747248" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>I agree with the others. Let him go to meetings and stay far, far away. If you choose, there is a group like Al Anon for families. I believe that a group such as this will help you in the same way as will this site, except with direct contact. I will be going too. </p><p></p><p>You handled this situation very, very well, and he validated your changing by the way he responded, by doing his part. </p><p></p><p>I am finding that the more I can stay away from my son, the better it is for me. My only sphere of control is my home, what is mine, and me. I can appropriately set boundaries and seek and gain control over these, but when I become involved with things my son should want, should do, or should have, I have wandered away from what I am able to control. I am the one who has become inappropriate.</p><p></p><p>My son gets to decide for himself over himself and his life, but not over my home, and property. </p><p></p><p>I don't know why this was so difficult for me to understand and to accept.</p><p></p><p>We are two different people. Duh.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 747248, member: 18958"] I agree with the others. Let him go to meetings and stay far, far away. If you choose, there is a group like Al Anon for families. I believe that a group such as this will help you in the same way as will this site, except with direct contact. I will be going too. You handled this situation very, very well, and he validated your changing by the way he responded, by doing his part. I am finding that the more I can stay away from my son, the better it is for me. My only sphere of control is my home, what is mine, and me. I can appropriately set boundaries and seek and gain control over these, but when I become involved with things my son should want, should do, or should have, I have wandered away from what I am able to control. I am the one who has become inappropriate. My son gets to decide for himself over himself and his life, but not over my home, and property. I don't know why this was so difficult for me to understand and to accept. We are two different people. Duh. [/QUOTE]
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Update... I took advice from many and it worked
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