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Parent Emeritus
Update on my son.
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 733289" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>HH, for me, much had to do with the powerlessness I felt when I couldn't control the situation....it was overwhelming. I was a huge enabler, a fixer, a controller, I was super woman! And, it almost killed me. My daughter's shenanigans forced me to go deep within to pull up those issues of how I was defined by my giving, my fixing, my super woman 'powers'.....and as I had to let those go....it was pretty devastating....not only the grief of disengaging from my daughter, but the deep well of grief, fear and sorrow for myself and how I had abandoned myself to the role of enabler.....losing myself in it.....and finding myself as I moved thru the pain of shifting my stance with my daughter to include my own self, my own boundaries, my own honoring of myself. </p><p></p><p>You are in the pain of letting go, not only of your son's fate, but of your illusionary control.....recognizing that we are truly powerless in life to change anything but ourselves....and that pain, that deep grief leads to acceptance.....so hang in there, allow yourself to feel that grief, it's healing to let go. There isn't anything you have to do.....simply be with your feelings.....you'll get to the other side and you'll feel some relief.....</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 733289, member: 13542"] HH, for me, much had to do with the powerlessness I felt when I couldn't control the situation....it was overwhelming. I was a huge enabler, a fixer, a controller, I was super woman! And, it almost killed me. My daughter's shenanigans forced me to go deep within to pull up those issues of how I was defined by my giving, my fixing, my super woman 'powers'.....and as I had to let those go....it was pretty devastating....not only the grief of disengaging from my daughter, but the deep well of grief, fear and sorrow for myself and how I had abandoned myself to the role of enabler.....losing myself in it.....and finding myself as I moved thru the pain of shifting my stance with my daughter to include my own self, my own boundaries, my own honoring of myself. You are in the pain of letting go, not only of your son's fate, but of your illusionary control.....recognizing that we are truly powerless in life to change anything but ourselves....and that pain, that deep grief leads to acceptance.....so hang in there, allow yourself to feel that grief, it's healing to let go. There isn't anything you have to do.....simply be with your feelings.....you'll get to the other side and you'll feel some relief..... [/QUOTE]
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Update on my son.
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