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Substance Abuse
Wanted to give an update and need a boost
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember1" data-source="post: 749176" data-attributes="member: 23706"><p>I am in Al Anon. My advice is to say nothing. No response. And do nothing. Alcoholism is an illness that impedes the ability to feel empathy. He doesnt care how you feel and will only text back hurtful abuse. You dont need to throw oil on a fire. It wont affect him except to anger him. He is still very ill. He needs to be clean of alcohol to feel empathy again.</p><p></p><p>You didnt cause it, you cant control it and you cant cure it. I would block him so he cant text you about the bill. You need to let him do what he can do for himself in my opinion. And Al Anon. He can stop getting tatoos and doing stupid things that land him in ER. He wont learn in my opinion if you rescue him. You have already helped him. There comes atime to stop. Yes, we enabled badly and finally learned. It is hard to stop but necessary.</p><p></p><p>To those who know I am on vacation, it is so peaceful to not have our phones. We plan on a moonlight walk by the beach in a few minutes. We made a rule not to talk about Kay to one another on this trip and we have not. I again recommend anyone who can to get away to do so for a rest and shut off the phones. We thought at one time that we could save Kay. We made her entitled, worse and childish. At age 33. She is still helpless and very rude too and still smoking pot and maybe more every day.</p><p></p><p>The money doesnt help.</p><p></p><p>Take care. I understand the urge to give him a piece of your mind. But it will only cause him anger and he will hurt you and I dont think you deserve it. We heard plenty. We are done...I hope I can be strong enough to keep doing it. We have done it for several weeks. She wont text us and we havent texted her. She only called once to taunt us and we hung up the call.</p><p></p><p>Stay strong!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember1, post: 749176, member: 23706"] I am in Al Anon. My advice is to say nothing. No response. And do nothing. Alcoholism is an illness that impedes the ability to feel empathy. He doesnt care how you feel and will only text back hurtful abuse. You dont need to throw oil on a fire. It wont affect him except to anger him. He is still very ill. He needs to be clean of alcohol to feel empathy again. You didnt cause it, you cant control it and you cant cure it. I would block him so he cant text you about the bill. You need to let him do what he can do for himself in my opinion. And Al Anon. He can stop getting tatoos and doing stupid things that land him in ER. He wont learn in my opinion if you rescue him. You have already helped him. There comes atime to stop. Yes, we enabled badly and finally learned. It is hard to stop but necessary. To those who know I am on vacation, it is so peaceful to not have our phones. We plan on a moonlight walk by the beach in a few minutes. We made a rule not to talk about Kay to one another on this trip and we have not. I again recommend anyone who can to get away to do so for a rest and shut off the phones. We thought at one time that we could save Kay. We made her entitled, worse and childish. At age 33. She is still helpless and very rude too and still smoking pot and maybe more every day. The money doesnt help. Take care. I understand the urge to give him a piece of your mind. But it will only cause him anger and he will hurt you and I dont think you deserve it. We heard plenty. We are done...I hope I can be strong enough to keep doing it. We have done it for several weeks. She wont text us and we havent texted her. She only called once to taunt us and we hung up the call. Stay strong! [/QUOTE]
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