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War in my house at 2 am....
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<blockquote data-quote="slsh" data-source="post: 203704" data-attributes="member: 8"><p>Bran - does not sound like a great night. I'm sorry! At least the young man you called back was rational and reasonable.</p><p> </p><p>Remind me.... why is her curfew 1:00? And what does she do during the days (job, school)?</p><p> </p><p>This is just my opinion but I'd seriously change the curfew time - not because of difficult child but because of the rest of the family. You all have the right to get a decent night's sleep. It is not about her, and your family life needs to stop accommodating her. Doors get locked at 10 p.m. and phone gets turned off. Period.</p><p> </p><p>I understand your fears, more than you know. Things are in a sorry state when you feel like you will have been truly blessed if the worst thing that happens to your kid is he gets arrested - which is where I'm at right now. Any phone call after 9:00 p.m. literally makes my heart skip a beat because I'm just waiting for the bad news, you know?</p><p> </p><p>I find it incredibly frustrating, after years of being a halfway decent advocate, to be completely sabotaged by my own kid's efforts at avoiding everything. It's like talking to a rock. The path I see him going down can have no good end. Trying to make him understand that is absolutely impossible because his thought processes are so completely fouled up - there's very little logic (if any) to his thinking and that is compounded by this ridiculously enormous gradiose component. He knows it all, can do it all, blah blah blah, when in *fact* he doesn't do *anything* and continues to place himself in some really unsafe situations. </p><p> </p><p>It's the ultimate and most frustrating Catch-22 of mental illness. Our kids have the "right" of self-determination, the right to refuse treatment, yet by any reasonable standard they are far too ill to exercise that right in any practical manner. And there isn't a doggone thing we as parents can do.</p><p> </p><p>I'm so very sorry. I hope that you and husband are able to work out something to keep the family intact.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="slsh, post: 203704, member: 8"] Bran - does not sound like a great night. I'm sorry! At least the young man you called back was rational and reasonable. Remind me.... why is her curfew 1:00? And what does she do during the days (job, school)? This is just my opinion but I'd seriously change the curfew time - not because of difficult child but because of the rest of the family. You all have the right to get a decent night's sleep. It is not about her, and your family life needs to stop accommodating her. Doors get locked at 10 p.m. and phone gets turned off. Period. I understand your fears, more than you know. Things are in a sorry state when you feel like you will have been truly blessed if the worst thing that happens to your kid is he gets arrested - which is where I'm at right now. Any phone call after 9:00 p.m. literally makes my heart skip a beat because I'm just waiting for the bad news, you know? I find it incredibly frustrating, after years of being a halfway decent advocate, to be completely sabotaged by my own kid's efforts at avoiding everything. It's like talking to a rock. The path I see him going down can have no good end. Trying to make him understand that is absolutely impossible because his thought processes are so completely fouled up - there's very little logic (if any) to his thinking and that is compounded by this ridiculously enormous gradiose component. He knows it all, can do it all, blah blah blah, when in *fact* he doesn't do *anything* and continues to place himself in some really unsafe situations. It's the ultimate and most frustrating Catch-22 of mental illness. Our kids have the "right" of self-determination, the right to refuse treatment, yet by any reasonable standard they are far too ill to exercise that right in any practical manner. And there isn't a doggone thing we as parents can do. I'm so very sorry. I hope that you and husband are able to work out something to keep the family intact. [/QUOTE]
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