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Well, my son thinks demanding respectfulness is abuse towards him...lol
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 597072" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I sent him this text after he started yelling and swearing at me and I hung up on him. He actually thinks HE hung up on ME, thus the contents of the text:</p><p></p><p>My text to him right after I hung up: I love u but u do have to talk to me with respect. No shouting or swearing at me or name-calling. U can all me anytime as long as you are respectful.</p><p></p><p>35: off, hanging up, and blaming me is old. Stop with these stupid text threats. (Honestly, he was on good behavior for this text back to me...at least for him!)</p><p></p><p>What twisted thinking. In his mind, I abused him by demanding he not swear at me, yell, or call me names. I've been doing that all the time lately and it enrages him. He tells me to apologize...lol. And, trust me, he really feels, in his mind, that my demands that he talk respectfully are being mean to him because he is "going through hell." Skotti, I think you may have been partially right about the borderline with him only I believe he has many traits of a mixture of personality disorders. Borderline is but a part.</p><p></p><p>Well, he didn't call me this morning. He usually does. Guess it's just too much for him to treat me like a decent person...lol.</p><p></p><p>Thanks, Al-Anon. I just wish they had more meetings here. We only have al-Anon meetings on Thursdays and Saturdays in this small town. If I thought AA or NA would help me, I'd go, but I think they are too off track for what I need. We have lots of those meetings.</p><p></p><p>Oh, well. Al-Anon is also online!!!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 597072, member: 1550"] I sent him this text after he started yelling and swearing at me and I hung up on him. He actually thinks HE hung up on ME, thus the contents of the text: My text to him right after I hung up: I love u but u do have to talk to me with respect. No shouting or swearing at me or name-calling. U can all me anytime as long as you are respectful. 35: off, hanging up, and blaming me is old. Stop with these stupid text threats. (Honestly, he was on good behavior for this text back to me...at least for him!) What twisted thinking. In his mind, I abused him by demanding he not swear at me, yell, or call me names. I've been doing that all the time lately and it enrages him. He tells me to apologize...lol. And, trust me, he really feels, in his mind, that my demands that he talk respectfully are being mean to him because he is "going through hell." Skotti, I think you may have been partially right about the borderline with him only I believe he has many traits of a mixture of personality disorders. Borderline is but a part. Well, he didn't call me this morning. He usually does. Guess it's just too much for him to treat me like a decent person...lol. Thanks, Al-Anon. I just wish they had more meetings here. We only have al-Anon meetings on Thursdays and Saturdays in this small town. If I thought AA or NA would help me, I'd go, but I think they are too off track for what I need. We have lots of those meetings. Oh, well. Al-Anon is also online!!! [/QUOTE]
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Well, my son thinks demanding respectfulness is abuse towards him...lol
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