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<blockquote data-quote="Ephchap" data-source="post: 130155" data-attributes="member: 27"><p>Mikey,</p><p></p><p>Do I think he's asking/screaming for help? Yes. It sounds like he knows he needs the help, but doesn't know what to do about it.</p><p></p><p>I think my son was in that same place, when he just turned 17. He was also arrested, but his was a felony, and even though he was 17, he was considered an adult.</p><p></p><p>Before his arrest, however, we had been trying to get him a bed at a locked, dual-diagnostic facility. The opening occurred after his arrest, unfortunately, but before his court date.</p><p></p><p>Though he did end up spending 5 days in the county not nice at all adult jail, we bailed him out on the condition he enter the other program. It was a locked facility, just like jail, so there was no leaving. I guess if push came to shove, he could have signed himself out ... but he never did.</p><p></p><p>Like your son, I think mine knew he was going down that black hole and just couldn't stop himself.</p><p></p><p>The locked facility gave him the help he needed. We were the "fall guys" as we "forced" him into it. Of course, it wasn't much different than jail, or at least that's what his drugging "friends" thought.</p><p></p><p>Thankfully, by the time he got out 10 months later (the judge had agreed to let him stay in there instead of pulling him out of there to go to the adult jail like the prosecutor wanted at his court hearing), all his so-called drug "friends" weren't around and we actually moved about 5 miles from where we previously lived. It wasn't just because of difficult child, although I have to admit that moving away from where the druggies all knew my house, as did the dealers, etc. - was a good move for us.</p><p></p><p>I wish there was a perfect one answer fits all, but unfortunately, there isn't. I guess you just have to see where the chips fall, and try to do what's best for your son and for your family. It's not an easy thing to do. It's gut wrenching, in fact.</p><p></p><p>Hang in there.</p><p></p><p>Sending hugs and good thoughts your way,</p><p>Deb</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Ephchap, post: 130155, member: 27"] Mikey, Do I think he's asking/screaming for help? Yes. It sounds like he knows he needs the help, but doesn't know what to do about it. I think my son was in that same place, when he just turned 17. He was also arrested, but his was a felony, and even though he was 17, he was considered an adult. Before his arrest, however, we had been trying to get him a bed at a locked, dual-diagnostic facility. The opening occurred after his arrest, unfortunately, but before his court date. Though he did end up spending 5 days in the county not nice at all adult jail, we bailed him out on the condition he enter the other program. It was a locked facility, just like jail, so there was no leaving. I guess if push came to shove, he could have signed himself out ... but he never did. Like your son, I think mine knew he was going down that black hole and just couldn't stop himself. The locked facility gave him the help he needed. We were the "fall guys" as we "forced" him into it. Of course, it wasn't much different than jail, or at least that's what his drugging "friends" thought. Thankfully, by the time he got out 10 months later (the judge had agreed to let him stay in there instead of pulling him out of there to go to the adult jail like the prosecutor wanted at his court hearing), all his so-called drug "friends" weren't around and we actually moved about 5 miles from where we previously lived. It wasn't just because of difficult child, although I have to admit that moving away from where the druggies all knew my house, as did the dealers, etc. - was a good move for us. I wish there was a perfect one answer fits all, but unfortunately, there isn't. I guess you just have to see where the chips fall, and try to do what's best for your son and for your family. It's not an easy thing to do. It's gut wrenching, in fact. Hang in there. Sending hugs and good thoughts your way, Deb [/QUOTE]
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