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What do you tell people?
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 749548" data-attributes="member: 4152"><p>Levels of candid...thank you Albatross...and ditto</p><p></p><p>Many people I will tell about ADHD. A few more about ADHD and some health issues. Those two things together certainly can "explain away" odd behaviors. VERY very FEW will I tell about her mental illness diagnosis.</p><p>I too say things like..."she is still struggling." Or I might remind them that she has a good heart, but still has issues that make life complicated. I can be vague. I like to remind them that she has a good heart. IT seems to take them away from any "anger" and a little more toward compassion. Some are a bit confused. Some, I suspect have basically figured it out on their own.</p><p></p><p>As a side note...I'm a bit tired and a bit scared now that hubby and I are getting older and there is only a minuscule improvement. She truly is disabled. It's sad.</p><p></p><p>Thank you for this, RE...it's very helpful/wise/appropriate:</p><p>I like the way Brene' Brown addresses this issue, she says,</p><p><em>“Our stories are not meant for everyone. Hearing them is a privilege, and we should always ask ourselves this before we share: "Who has earned the right to hear my story?" If we have one or two people in our lives who can sit with us and hold space for our shame stories, and love us for our strengths and struggles, we are incredibly lucky. If we have a friend, or small group of friends, or family who embraces our imperfections, vulnerabilities, and power, and fills us with a sense of belonging, we are incredibly lucky.”</em></p><p><em></em></p><p>Agree!!! However, I do find at times this burden great. IT's good to talk here, at times with a therapist, a VERY good friend who understands. The burden is tremendous and not everyone fully understands. BUT, like Brene Brown says...it's not for everyone to hear. I experienced deep pain when one of my friends actually took some sort of weird pleasure in hearing my stories about our Difficult Child. It seem to make her feel like her life was easier, so she wished to hear more and more from me for this reason. I didn't appreciate this. It made me feel horrible.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 749548, member: 4152"] Levels of candid...thank you Albatross...and ditto Many people I will tell about ADHD. A few more about ADHD and some health issues. Those two things together certainly can "explain away" odd behaviors. VERY very FEW will I tell about her mental illness diagnosis. I too say things like..."she is still struggling." Or I might remind them that she has a good heart, but still has issues that make life complicated. I can be vague. I like to remind them that she has a good heart. IT seems to take them away from any "anger" and a little more toward compassion. Some are a bit confused. Some, I suspect have basically figured it out on their own. As a side note...I'm a bit tired and a bit scared now that hubby and I are getting older and there is only a minuscule improvement. She truly is disabled. It's sad. Thank you for this, RE...it's very helpful/wise/appropriate: I like the way Brene' Brown addresses this issue, she says, [I]“Our stories are not meant for everyone. Hearing them is a privilege, and we should always ask ourselves this before we share: "Who has earned the right to hear my story?" If we have one or two people in our lives who can sit with us and hold space for our shame stories, and love us for our strengths and struggles, we are incredibly lucky. If we have a friend, or small group of friends, or family who embraces our imperfections, vulnerabilities, and power, and fills us with a sense of belonging, we are incredibly lucky.” [/I] Agree!!! However, I do find at times this burden great. IT's good to talk here, at times with a therapist, a VERY good friend who understands. The burden is tremendous and not everyone fully understands. BUT, like Brene Brown says...it's not for everyone to hear. I experienced deep pain when one of my friends actually took some sort of weird pleasure in hearing my stories about our Difficult Child. It seem to make her feel like her life was easier, so she wished to hear more and more from me for this reason. I didn't appreciate this. It made me feel horrible. [/QUOTE]
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