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What does detachment look like to you?
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<blockquote data-quote="lovemysons" data-source="post: 611146" data-attributes="member: 3305"><p>For me it's like the seed of a beautiful flower that I planted and nurtured and now...it's time to get out of the way to stop blocking the sunlight and let God do His handy work. </p><p></p><p>It's such a process though...but I see even in our Country's foundation the words have been layed out...because each "individual" has the right to pursue life, liberty, and happiness. </p><p>If they are to "pursue" than I must get out of the way so they can take "their" next step...not mine. </p><p></p><p>It's so hard.</p><p>The other night after my difficult child was abrubtly discharged from psychiatric hospital, his truck wouldn't start...so I drove to the city and helped him jump it. He then ask me "What do I do? Where do I go". I gave him a suggestion of going to his PO if "it were me". I told him "Your life is in your hands". </p><p></p><p>Also at night before I go to sleep I pray. I pray that as I reach out and hand difficult child over to the care of God (one more time) that it is not "my will" but God's that will be done. I see myself handing my baby over to the Creator. </p><p>That is how I sleep at night. </p><p></p><p>I am not there yet...this whole "detaching thing" is painfully difficult. </p><p>I am trying to see, adopt, the philosophy of who rightfully holds the keys and should take owndership of difficult child choices. Is this my problem? or his? Is this "My solution" or his? If his life is truly in his hands...then I have to keep my hands off of it. I am not responsible for the outcome. I am NOT responsible for the outcome. </p><p></p><p>I have done all I should...my difficult child is 24 now and has 3 beautiful children who he should be accountable to...who HE should be responsible for...how is he to do this if we keep propping him up all the time? He HAS to learn to be a survivor and find that internal drive to move forward one step at a time and find success in doing so. </p><p></p><p>Thank you for making me think this morning. It helps to put it into writing and see what is rightfully difficult child's and what is mine. </p><p>LMS</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="lovemysons, post: 611146, member: 3305"] For me it's like the seed of a beautiful flower that I planted and nurtured and now...it's time to get out of the way to stop blocking the sunlight and let God do His handy work. It's such a process though...but I see even in our Country's foundation the words have been layed out...because each "individual" has the right to pursue life, liberty, and happiness. If they are to "pursue" than I must get out of the way so they can take "their" next step...not mine. It's so hard. The other night after my difficult child was abrubtly discharged from psychiatric hospital, his truck wouldn't start...so I drove to the city and helped him jump it. He then ask me "What do I do? Where do I go". I gave him a suggestion of going to his PO if "it were me". I told him "Your life is in your hands". Also at night before I go to sleep I pray. I pray that as I reach out and hand difficult child over to the care of God (one more time) that it is not "my will" but God's that will be done. I see myself handing my baby over to the Creator. That is how I sleep at night. I am not there yet...this whole "detaching thing" is painfully difficult. I am trying to see, adopt, the philosophy of who rightfully holds the keys and should take owndership of difficult child choices. Is this my problem? or his? Is this "My solution" or his? If his life is truly in his hands...then I have to keep my hands off of it. I am not responsible for the outcome. I am NOT responsible for the outcome. I have done all I should...my difficult child is 24 now and has 3 beautiful children who he should be accountable to...who HE should be responsible for...how is he to do this if we keep propping him up all the time? He HAS to learn to be a survivor and find that internal drive to move forward one step at a time and find success in doing so. Thank you for making me think this morning. It helps to put it into writing and see what is rightfully difficult child's and what is mine. LMS [/QUOTE]
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