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What have i done so wrong to make my adult daughter dislike me so much?
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 650066" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I have a few thoughts.</p><p></p><p>First of all, get counseling so you can move on. Your daughter is manipulative and mean and wants to hurt you. Why do you want her in your life if s he is that way? You need help.</p><p></p><p>Also, I would put the kabosh on husband. She is doing that to cause a split between you and again to make you feel bad. You are a team. He should tell her, in my opinion, "You can not treat your mother this way or I am not going to have a relationship with you until you stop. She is my wife and if you won't talk to her, I won't talk to you." </p><p></p><p>She is playing baby games with you and you are spending too much time thinking about her. The fact is, she's not a good daughter and you should focus on your own life and your daughters who love you and kindly ask them to not get involved in your daughter's drama...that you don't want to know what she says. The less people involved in her game, the less fun it is for her and the less power she has. It may be hard, but I'd stay away from her FB or defriend her, tell your other girls you are no longer talking about her...that it is just between you and your daughter...and really lay it on your husband who should not be involved at all.</p><p></p><p>When she feels her hurtful support system falling apart, she will likely start going off on everyone else too and lose her support, but that is her decision. </p><p></p><p>It's time for you to take your power away from her. Be firm with your other loved ones and tell them without wavering that if they speak about this daughter and in husband's case if he keeps talking to her, you will walk away or leave the house if t hey start mentioning her. Make it between you and daughter and enforce it. Your daughter really enjoys all this attention. I wonder if she has borderline personality disorder. </p><p></p><p>Regardless, you have a life to live and others who love you. Don't waste your time thinking only about the one who is not nice. You can't change her and you have a lot of life to live and a lot of happiness in your future if you stop getting pulled into her drama. It is sad when a grown child plays baby games, but it IS possible to move on. I would try it. If not, you could have no life at all and that is so unfair to you and to others who love you. </p><p></p><p>Drop the constant talk to ANYONE about this daughter. It's you and your daughter, not you, your daughter, your two other daughters and a husband too. Make that clear and get help to help you continue to live without the constant depression. You have many blessings too and it's best to focus on those things.</p><p></p><p>Hugs!!!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 650066, member: 1550"] I have a few thoughts. First of all, get counseling so you can move on. Your daughter is manipulative and mean and wants to hurt you. Why do you want her in your life if s he is that way? You need help. Also, I would put the kabosh on husband. She is doing that to cause a split between you and again to make you feel bad. You are a team. He should tell her, in my opinion, "You can not treat your mother this way or I am not going to have a relationship with you until you stop. She is my wife and if you won't talk to her, I won't talk to you." She is playing baby games with you and you are spending too much time thinking about her. The fact is, she's not a good daughter and you should focus on your own life and your daughters who love you and kindly ask them to not get involved in your daughter's drama...that you don't want to know what she says. The less people involved in her game, the less fun it is for her and the less power she has. It may be hard, but I'd stay away from her FB or defriend her, tell your other girls you are no longer talking about her...that it is just between you and your daughter...and really lay it on your husband who should not be involved at all. When she feels her hurtful support system falling apart, she will likely start going off on everyone else too and lose her support, but that is her decision. It's time for you to take your power away from her. Be firm with your other loved ones and tell them without wavering that if they speak about this daughter and in husband's case if he keeps talking to her, you will walk away or leave the house if t hey start mentioning her. Make it between you and daughter and enforce it. Your daughter really enjoys all this attention. I wonder if she has borderline personality disorder. Regardless, you have a life to live and others who love you. Don't waste your time thinking only about the one who is not nice. You can't change her and you have a lot of life to live and a lot of happiness in your future if you stop getting pulled into her drama. It is sad when a grown child plays baby games, but it IS possible to move on. I would try it. If not, you could have no life at all and that is so unfair to you and to others who love you. Drop the constant talk to ANYONE about this daughter. It's you and your daughter, not you, your daughter, your two other daughters and a husband too. Make that clear and get help to help you continue to live without the constant depression. You have many blessings too and it's best to focus on those things. Hugs!!! [/QUOTE]
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What have i done so wrong to make my adult daughter dislike me so much?
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