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What is he doing?
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<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 668926" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>I don't know how I feel about this yet. I mean, we're not 100% sure she is pregnant, so we may even be jumping the gun. That's why we're waiting for confirmation before we do anything. I'm not that angry...at least not at the girl. I'm sad. I didn't want this. I didn't want to be a grandmother for years yet. I certainly didn't want to be a grandmother of a child who's mother I've never even met! </p><p> </p><p>And I didn't intend to meet her! Not unless he asked us to come meet her. Maybe at the holidays when the family gets together. Before they moved in with sis, I thought, maybe we'd take them out to dinner for Thanksgiving. Maybe we'd meet them for Xmas and feed them and give them gifts... But now? How do I stay uninvolved. I WANT to stay uninvolved. What kind of person doesn't want to be a part of this?</p><p> </p><p>Jabber said the other day something about having to meet her parents eventually...and what bad people they will think we are. That we're the parents of the young man who got their 18 year old daughter pregnant is bad enough. We're the parents who threw him out and made him homeless. We raised a person who is bad enough his own parents won't have him at home. What must they think of him? What must they think of us? I mean...WE know we tried to be good parents...but let's face it folks, people who didn't raise kids like ours, they don't understand. Most people think "bad kids" come from bad homes, bad people, bad parents. And in our case, he literally met her on the internet, came and got her right before her 18th birthday, and ran off with her and then knocked her up! I mean, that's a awful way to look at it...but if I were her father - I'd hate him with every fiber of my being! </p><p> </p><p>Then there's the fact that we don't want to support him...can't support him if he's ever going to change...so how do we do anything for her if they're together? How do we give to her and the baby without him benefiting from it? I can see the day when I get the phone call: <em>We're homeless! We're in the cold! We're starving! What about L? What about the baby? You HAVE to help! What kind of person doesn't help a baby? </em>I can see HER calling and asking for stuff...If they break up, do we send her money? It's HIS job to support the child, not ours. Will we ever even see this child? Will she even let us know when it's born?</p><p> </p><p>I am filled with sadness and apprehension and confusion. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/cry.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":cry:" title="cry :cry:" data-shortname=":cry:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 668926, member: 17309"] I don't know how I feel about this yet. I mean, we're not 100% sure she is pregnant, so we may even be jumping the gun. That's why we're waiting for confirmation before we do anything. I'm not that angry...at least not at the girl. I'm sad. I didn't want this. I didn't want to be a grandmother for years yet. I certainly didn't want to be a grandmother of a child who's mother I've never even met! And I didn't intend to meet her! Not unless he asked us to come meet her. Maybe at the holidays when the family gets together. Before they moved in with sis, I thought, maybe we'd take them out to dinner for Thanksgiving. Maybe we'd meet them for Xmas and feed them and give them gifts... But now? How do I stay uninvolved. I WANT to stay uninvolved. What kind of person doesn't want to be a part of this? Jabber said the other day something about having to meet her parents eventually...and what bad people they will think we are. That we're the parents of the young man who got their 18 year old daughter pregnant is bad enough. We're the parents who threw him out and made him homeless. We raised a person who is bad enough his own parents won't have him at home. What must they think of him? What must they think of us? I mean...WE know we tried to be good parents...but let's face it folks, people who didn't raise kids like ours, they don't understand. Most people think "bad kids" come from bad homes, bad people, bad parents. And in our case, he literally met her on the internet, came and got her right before her 18th birthday, and ran off with her and then knocked her up! I mean, that's a awful way to look at it...but if I were her father - I'd hate him with every fiber of my being! Then there's the fact that we don't want to support him...can't support him if he's ever going to change...so how do we do anything for her if they're together? How do we give to her and the baby without him benefiting from it? I can see the day when I get the phone call: [I]We're homeless! We're in the cold! We're starving! What about L? What about the baby? You HAVE to help! What kind of person doesn't help a baby? [/I]I can see HER calling and asking for stuff...If they break up, do we send her money? It's HIS job to support the child, not ours. Will we ever even see this child? Will she even let us know when it's born? I am filled with sadness and apprehension and confusion. :cry: [/QUOTE]
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