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Family of Origin
What is your relationship like with your 1st cousins?
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 737542" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Wish, nobody ever talked to me about why my mother disliked me. The little feedback I would get was sort of "I dont know" to "it was your fault" to " you were abusive to her." It was crazy. An infant abusive to her...lol. when older I fought back. Guess I was supposed to take it.</p><p></p><p> My sister, whom I decided never to speak to again, spends half her time trying to diagnose me with horrendous disorders that I dont have. I have been in therapy most of my adult life and nobody but her diagnosed me with these things or ebven close. But, hey, she is a teachers aide so maybe she knows more than psychiatrists from Mayo Clinic? She posts her stuff online. I stopped reading her.</p><p></p><p>I emotionally left most of my family after I divorced at around 35. I stuck around physically and spent years trying to make things right with my mother. My spiritual beliefs are that you try all you can while you are both here, but sometimes the other soul wont accept any attempt to solve issue until the afterlife. I wasnt even sure what I did wrong but I sent her love letters with apologies for ???. I am sorry I tried and sorry I did not cut off sister sooner. There was no hope. I loved them very much but feel both had a limited capacity to love back.</p><p></p><p>Your grandfather is disrespecting you when he wont answer you and it is rude of him to hang up on you for any reason. Why do you get so upset if he gets angry? I was like you once. I dont care anymore if I know I am right for myself and others get angry. In my current, better state of mind, my best advice to you is to tell grandfather gently, "I love you very much, but for reasons I have expressed, I am not going." If he hangs up, he hangs up..Its not his life you live. It is yours. Go on with your life, away from those cousins who abuse you and your daughter. Your grandfather will not stay angry forever. If he does, you have to wonder if he is capable of empathy. Is his approval worth your angst?</p><p></p><p>How you look to others is none of his business nor should YOU go for that reason.</p><p></p><p>Love and light!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 737542, member: 1550"] Wish, nobody ever talked to me about why my mother disliked me. The little feedback I would get was sort of "I dont know" to "it was your fault" to " you were abusive to her." It was crazy. An infant abusive to her...lol. when older I fought back. Guess I was supposed to take it. My sister, whom I decided never to speak to again, spends half her time trying to diagnose me with horrendous disorders that I dont have. I have been in therapy most of my adult life and nobody but her diagnosed me with these things or ebven close. But, hey, she is a teachers aide so maybe she knows more than psychiatrists from Mayo Clinic? She posts her stuff online. I stopped reading her. I emotionally left most of my family after I divorced at around 35. I stuck around physically and spent years trying to make things right with my mother. My spiritual beliefs are that you try all you can while you are both here, but sometimes the other soul wont accept any attempt to solve issue until the afterlife. I wasnt even sure what I did wrong but I sent her love letters with apologies for ???. I am sorry I tried and sorry I did not cut off sister sooner. There was no hope. I loved them very much but feel both had a limited capacity to love back. Your grandfather is disrespecting you when he wont answer you and it is rude of him to hang up on you for any reason. Why do you get so upset if he gets angry? I was like you once. I dont care anymore if I know I am right for myself and others get angry. In my current, better state of mind, my best advice to you is to tell grandfather gently, "I love you very much, but for reasons I have expressed, I am not going." If he hangs up, he hangs up..Its not his life you live. It is yours. Go on with your life, away from those cousins who abuse you and your daughter. Your grandfather will not stay angry forever. If he does, you have to wonder if he is capable of empathy. Is his approval worth your angst? How you look to others is none of his business nor should YOU go for that reason. Love and light! [/QUOTE]
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What is your relationship like with your 1st cousins?
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