Thanks Echo, I always like to read what you write.
I am really doing okay. I am very grateful today that I am super-busy at work. I have so much work going on I can't see straight (good for a small business owner who is responsible for killing it, dragging it home and doing something with it, lol).
Plus I'm in grad school taking one class at a time so I will be 100 years old by the time I get my Master's...this semester's class is the hardest of the curriculum.
God is good that way. He gives me so much daily responsibility I can't (well I guess I COULD, but I'm not) focus on difficult child too much.
I love what you wrote about your son. We think we have fixed in our mind what we have agreed to with them, and then it starts going sideways somehow and we're left....thinking....what?
My son said he can't get a phone on the weekends---he would have to borrow one to make a call as the day shelter is closed Sat and Sun. So I said you can call me Friday. I kind of left the door open about getting together for lunch on Saturday. My instincts are telling me that's too much, too fast.
So I am thinking of taking the call on Friday and having a supportive conversation (well, that's MY plan anyway, we'll see how it goes) and then saying I can't meet on Saturday.
My experience/instincts/whatever it is---are saying caution, caution, caution---I am seeing yellow lights flashing....go slow. I am doing better. He is doing better. Let's not rock the boat, I say to myself. Let's just keep on doing what we are doing.
That's the newer me...not the mommy me. The mommy me says he has few/no services on the weekend and it would be helpful to him for me to buy him lunch. But...it's not my responsibility to figure out his lunch.
So...you see...sigh...Echo...it's just a one day at a time thing. We'll see what happens on Friday.
And it's good to write your story in the middle of my story---that is how I work things out...writing to other people as well, and layering their story with mine. Somehow that leads me to a newer story and a healthier story, I think.
Yes, it is a little sad to see him like this. I can't go there, though, Echo. I don't want to get lost in sad again, even though I will if I need to, at least for a while. I felt sad Sunday...ill-equipped to keep on without a break. I had to lie down with a bag of M&Ms, my kindle and read and take a nap. That's my go-to prescription to feel better fast---usually after an hour of sleep I can get up and do it all again. 
Have a good day today Echo!
