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Failure to Thrive
When they want to do their own thing...
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<blockquote data-quote="TeDo" data-source="post: 683839" data-attributes="member: 15799"><p>AnnieO, I need you to step back a bit to the very beginning my dear. Go all the way back to The Explosive Child techniques. WHY is he doing the various things he's doing or not doing. He was doing ok, although not the best, before Rose came along. Did you ask his help when she was younger and now that she's older, he isn't "needed" anymore? I realize she's your miracle baby and all that comes with it but I really think he's feeling like a non-entity, unless he's doing something wrong. We've talked before about how Pat and my #1 are so much alike. #2 has had a job for 3 years now because he has the ability and people skills to hold one down. #1 will be 18 in July and hasn't worked a day in his life because he doesn't have the ability or people skills, not to mention all the anxiety, to find or keep one that's available for kids. As for chores, Jeremy's room is a sty but it's HIS room and he has to keep the door closed because I don't want to see his mess. I don't allow "messes" in MY living spaces (the rest of the house LOL) but HE has to live in his room. While tough love is what Belle needed, Pat is a totally different ball game and I think you're going to end up doing more harm than good with the techniques you're using with him. He not only has "lost" his sister, he's losing you and husband as well ...... to Rose. When was the last time either of you spent 1:1 quality time with him doing what HE wants to do? Just putting that out there .... food for thought.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TeDo, post: 683839, member: 15799"] AnnieO, I need you to step back a bit to the very beginning my dear. Go all the way back to The Explosive Child techniques. WHY is he doing the various things he's doing or not doing. He was doing ok, although not the best, before Rose came along. Did you ask his help when she was younger and now that she's older, he isn't "needed" anymore? I realize she's your miracle baby and all that comes with it but I really think he's feeling like a non-entity, unless he's doing something wrong. We've talked before about how Pat and my #1 are so much alike. #2 has had a job for 3 years now because he has the ability and people skills to hold one down. #1 will be 18 in July and hasn't worked a day in his life because he doesn't have the ability or people skills, not to mention all the anxiety, to find or keep one that's available for kids. As for chores, Jeremy's room is a sty but it's HIS room and he has to keep the door closed because I don't want to see his mess. I don't allow "messes" in MY living spaces (the rest of the house LOL) but HE has to live in his room. While tough love is what Belle needed, Pat is a totally different ball game and I think you're going to end up doing more harm than good with the techniques you're using with him. He not only has "lost" his sister, he's losing you and husband as well ...... to Rose. When was the last time either of you spent 1:1 quality time with him doing what HE wants to do? Just putting that out there .... food for thought. [/QUOTE]
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