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Family of Origin
When you take the place of the real abuser in your abusers life
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 667001" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>They are tears of love. Good tears.</p><p></p><p>The think is Serenity, is everything in that email did not happen. It never occurred. It is all a product of her imagination. </p><p></p><p>All I said was XX is outside of the room talking to the doctor. I think I should go and participate because they may be discussing important things that I should know too. (I saw her outside the glass window in the door. My nieces were inside the room and must have told their mother later.</p><p></p><p>My sister, instead of taking to my mother's doctor inside the room in front of my mother and I, waited until the doctor left the room and spoke to her outside the room where we would not hear her.</p><p></p><p>What I did not know at the time but would find out after is that my mother had asked her the day before to not intrude in her medical care. My sister agreed she would not. </p><p></p><p>When my sister re-entered the room, my Mother then said: You promised xx not to intrude in my medical care. I ask you again, please. Do not take control over my medical care. COPA and I have arranged that I go to Rehab. I do not want that or anything else about my care disrupted.</p><p></p><p>And that my sister interpreted in the way she did.</p><p></p><p>I put that email here because we are trying to understand our sisters and how their actions toward us can illustrate, make clear how we had to distort ourselves to accommodate their interpretations of our families and us, limited as they were. As were ours. </p><p></p><p>It is toward that end I included the email. I was hoping I could find the one where she wanted me to buy my mother's things from her, but I could not. Probably for the best.</p><p></p><p>I am glad, Serenity, you had such a lovely day.</p><p></p><p>COPA</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 667001, member: 18958"] They are tears of love. Good tears. The think is Serenity, is everything in that email did not happen. It never occurred. It is all a product of her imagination. All I said was XX is outside of the room talking to the doctor. I think I should go and participate because they may be discussing important things that I should know too. (I saw her outside the glass window in the door. My nieces were inside the room and must have told their mother later. My sister, instead of taking to my mother's doctor inside the room in front of my mother and I, waited until the doctor left the room and spoke to her outside the room where we would not hear her. What I did not know at the time but would find out after is that my mother had asked her the day before to not intrude in her medical care. My sister agreed she would not. When my sister re-entered the room, my Mother then said: You promised xx not to intrude in my medical care. I ask you again, please. Do not take control over my medical care. COPA and I have arranged that I go to Rehab. I do not want that or anything else about my care disrupted. And that my sister interpreted in the way she did. I put that email here because we are trying to understand our sisters and how their actions toward us can illustrate, make clear how we had to distort ourselves to accommodate their interpretations of our families and us, limited as they were. As were ours. It is toward that end I included the email. I was hoping I could find the one where she wanted me to buy my mother's things from her, but I could not. Probably for the best. I am glad, Serenity, you had such a lovely day. COPA [/QUOTE]
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When you take the place of the real abuser in your abusers life
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