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Substance Abuse
Why did I take so long....
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<blockquote data-quote="stressedmama" data-source="post: 636287" data-attributes="member: 18412"><p>Hubby was definately in denial for a long time. I didn't see it for a long time but caught on before he did. He's the kind of guy that needs proof and I had none to provide - whether it was actual drug use, stealing money, etc. Without the hard evidence, there was no getting her out of the house. Mainly because our 3 yr old GS. He knew she was immature and irresponsible and he was not convinced SD could take care of her son properly on her own.</p><p> </p><p>Now that SD's in treatment and out of the house, he's made it clear to her she can't come back. As far as the continued manipulation, I'm convinced she's testing the boundaries with dad. He's spent her lifetime telling her yes to everything. Now he is actually is telling her no and I believe she believes she can still get another yes out of him. He's standing his ground and I am proud of him for that. </p><p> </p><p>I've always been the tough love type. It's hard when your mate is the exact opposite. Even when he would argue with her, he always ended up being the one to apologize or try to soften the blow. It made for very tough times and lots of arguments between he and I. He's not doing that now and it has made our relationship better. I pointed out to him yesterday we have not had one argument in the last couple weeks since she's been gone. There were daily arguments when she was around.</p><p> </p><p>I haven't backed out of taking the ride with him to drop off her things but I did tell him that's all it will be. We get so little time together alone. I don't want to miss that time with him. So a couple hours in the car, a very quick drop off of some bags and we are on our way. He was more than OK with that when I told him how I was feeling.</p><p> </p><p>I am the love of his life, too <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="stressedmama, post: 636287, member: 18412"] Hubby was definately in denial for a long time. I didn't see it for a long time but caught on before he did. He's the kind of guy that needs proof and I had none to provide - whether it was actual drug use, stealing money, etc. Without the hard evidence, there was no getting her out of the house. Mainly because our 3 yr old GS. He knew she was immature and irresponsible and he was not convinced SD could take care of her son properly on her own. Now that SD's in treatment and out of the house, he's made it clear to her she can't come back. As far as the continued manipulation, I'm convinced she's testing the boundaries with dad. He's spent her lifetime telling her yes to everything. Now he is actually is telling her no and I believe she believes she can still get another yes out of him. He's standing his ground and I am proud of him for that. I've always been the tough love type. It's hard when your mate is the exact opposite. Even when he would argue with her, he always ended up being the one to apologize or try to soften the blow. It made for very tough times and lots of arguments between he and I. He's not doing that now and it has made our relationship better. I pointed out to him yesterday we have not had one argument in the last couple weeks since she's been gone. There were daily arguments when she was around. I haven't backed out of taking the ride with him to drop off her things but I did tell him that's all it will be. We get so little time together alone. I don't want to miss that time with him. So a couple hours in the car, a very quick drop off of some bags and we are on our way. He was more than OK with that when I told him how I was feeling. I am the love of his life, too :-) [/QUOTE]
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